Tangents #02

***

"So how was your first time?"

He heard a giggle and opened his eyes. What followed was something he couldn't believe. It was Joanna lying beside him in bed, bare and sweaty. It felt like a familiar setup, and it also felt relaxing. He looked around and realized that it was her apartment.

"There are still a couple of those rubbers left, so why don't we... " she blushed red, looking sideways.

Am I back in time?he thought, as he stared down at himself and noticed he looked skinnier than his now - muscular self.

"Dru, come on say something?" She looked at him, waiting for his answer eagerly.

He snapped back to consciousness and replied, "I still don't believe this happened."

"If you're still in denial, then what are those?" She chuckled and pointed behind him.

He turned and saw a trail of things, things in a certain order. Clothes scattered at the door, his and her underwear near the bed. What caught his attention was a couple of condom wrappers and some used condoms, tied up with his cum inside them.

"As innocent as you are outside, you're an animal behind closed doors." She snuggled towards his back, running her hands over his chest and creeping down to his organ.

He felt like a jolt of electricity pass through his body from her soft, delicate touch. He inhaled sharply and closed his eyes as he felt her fingers wrap around his hard pole.

"I'll take this as a yes." She nibbled his ear, began stroking him aggressively.

He turned his head and kissed her hungrily.

"Dhruv, Dhruv, wake up! It's eight in the morning." A familiar voice called him.

Indira? How? We hadn't met yet...He tried to process how Indira came before they met.

"Wake up, sleepy head!!" she shook him awake.

"Indira?!" He woke up rubbing his eyes realizing it was a dream.

"Yeah, ME." She handed him a cup of coffee.

"Thank you. Morning." He greeted her.Why did I dream about her now?He took a sip from his coffee.

"You know, even though we're still naked and no one's there, I suggest that you should leave early as I have to pick up Bindu from the airport." She pointed at his crotch as his pole lifted the blanket like a tent.

"Sorry, it happens in the morning." He covered his crotch in embarrassment.

She smirked and said, "But I think we can squeeze a shower before leaving."

His face dropped as he set the cup on the side table.

"Indira..." He called her hesitantly.

"Yeah Dhruv, what?" She sensed a drop in his tone.

"I don't know how to put it... " His hands were fidgety.

"Look, you don't need to think about me. Speak your mind without restricting yourself." She held his hand, assuring him.

He took a deep breath and began, "Yesterday, before coming here. Joanna met me at the Rockstone bar."

He then went on to narrate the incidents that happened in the bar. The sudden reunion, the time spent with her and her friends, the feeling around her and the tease of meeting her again.

"I don't know but I felt like the old me yesterday." He concluded.

Indira listened to each word carefully and asked him, "You know she's married right?"

He bowed his head, "I know, but yesterday she was like how she was before everything... "

"Dhruv, avoid her at all costs. You don't know if she's trying to be friendly or trying to sneak behind her husband's back. There's no clear motive yet." She sighed.

"I know. She just met me and I suddenly turned into that old me when I'm with her." His voice had a desperation, longing.

"Dhruv, answer me honestly. Do you still have feelings for Joanna now?" She asked with a stern face.

"I don't know and that's the problem." He spoke in an uneasy tone.

"Then find out what you want with her first and then decide on how to act on it." She gave him clarity.

He nodded and got up from bed. "Does Bindu know about us?" He looked at her.

"She's too young to understand us, Dhruv. I told her that we're best friends as that was something she could understand." She replied with a smooth tone.

"Ok." He picked up his clothes and dressed up.

He kissed her forehead, "Make sure Bindu has all your time till her vacation ends. I'm here if you need me." He stroked her hair.

"She wants to see you too. I hope you're okay with this." She looked at him nervously.

"And I am up for it. Fix the day and I'll see her." He assured her.

"Bye, Indira. I'll see you soon." He waved as he left the room.

******

After two weeks...

Dhruv went to the Sunside Cafe to meet the director of the Netflix show, Milind Sakaria, who was supposed tosuggest some changes for some chapters of the book, but he took a rain check citing some personal issues.

Dhruv had been curious as all the chapters were written with good structure and proper endings but he was intrigued by what Milind would suggest changing. Even Joanna had reached out to Dhruv two days earlier, to accompany her for shopping but he used this as an excuse to turn her down.

There was a mall next to the cafe across the street and it was newly inaugurated last month. With Christmas coming in two weeks and the mall not that crowded, he thought he would check the mall out. He went inside the mall and strolled through the clothing section.

Not in the mood to buy clothes anyway...he thought as he briskly walked past the clothing stores.

He saw a book store and walked inside. It felt peaceful seeing people from kids to adults looking for something that suits their taste. He wanted to see if his book was there and asked the guy in the bookstore. He said it was in the bestsellers section. He went looking and didn't find a single copy on the shelf.

Still in demand, huh?He smiled in bliss, knowing that his work was getting more love than he expected.

"Looking for this?" A dead tone came from behind him.

He looked behind and froze in disbelief. It was Joanna, holding a copy of his book and staring at him.

"Oh hey Joanna. What a coincidence!" He exaggerated to cover up his nervousness.

She sighed and asked, "Weren't you supposed to be meeting your show director today?"

"He declined at the last minute due to a personal reason." He smiled sheepishly.

"So, is the verybusyDhruv available now?" She interrogated him.

Say no. Just say no!He thought looking at her stern look. Now they were alone, just the two of them. A meeting while her friends were present made him almost submit. This is a recipe for disaster even if they spent a moment together.

"Yes," his voice creaked.Aah FML, big time!"He thought as he folded like a thin sheet of paper to her verbal dominance.

She slowly smiled and wrapped her arm around his waist, "I would have killed you if you hadn't said yes." She giggled.

What?!His eyes opened wide after he heard her.

******

"So what are we here for?" Dhruv asked as they had searched every clothing store in the mall.

"I'm looking for a change in my wardrobe, so far nothing's tempting me." She said looking if any other clothing store was there that she didn't look into.

"And I guess that there are no more stores to check in now... " He smiled while he was internally in chaos.

"That decides it then. We have to go to the boutique I searched online. It's just a short drive from here." She clicked her tongue.

We? What is that guy doing anyway? Isn't his duty as a husband to go out with your wife not leaving her to see someone who had history with her...He thought. "So you had other options?" He sneered.

"Good things take time, Dru. Now... if you're done mocking me, we can go there." She pinched his waist.

"AH!! ok." He whimpered and followed her.

"And FYI, Ruth has my car. So, we're going in your car now." She dropped a bomb on his head.

Oh now I have to drop her home too? Come on...He rolled his eyes.

They walked to the elevator and found it surprisingly empty. They entered but he tried to keep his distance as that Almond and Vanilla fragrance was driving him crazy.

A floor down suddenly the elevator was now crowded with people, almost suffocating them but Joanna pulled him towards her like a defense mechanism.

But on the other side, Dhruv was now trying to survive the elevator ride. A guy slipped which made him almost collapse on her if he didn't brace against the walls to stop himself. He felt her breath on his chest which began blurring his boundaries. Her big, heavy breasts were rubbing under his chest, enticing him.

It's like fate's testing me, seeing if I'll give in or not...he thought as he lifted his head and clenched his jaw, waiting for them to reach the basement.

******

They went to that boutique and she took her time running through their collection and ended up picking up some casual clothes like she used to during college. But those clothes looked more revealing due to her now curvier body. He bit his lip and turned around as she came out of the trial room for his opinion while trying them out.

With the shopping now behind them, his initial thought was that it was done but Joanna made another plan to check out a restaurant nearby and have dinner. She told him it's on her as it's been long since they spent time together. He just sighed and accepted his fate.

She went in and ordered aFettuccine Alfredo with grilled chicken and some red wine. The restaurant looked fancy and he had a feeling that he should pick up the bill. But Joanna paid the bill last time without any hassle while she was not known to be a spendthrift, or at least that's what he remembered from his time with her.

"Looks like someone's living the high life here... " he poked her.

"Well, I'm earning well, so it also translates to spending as well." She shrugged her shoulders like it was nothing.

"You're earning?" He asked, perplexed.

"Yeah. Oh I forgot to tell you, I started an artisan market two years back focused on Indian handicrafts and interior works and it became very lucrative after we made a deal with some foreign markets. So, you know." She smirked.

He sat there blankly, looking at her. The Joanna he knew wanted a job where she would just do nothing and expected a paycheck handed to her. This Joanna is suddenly the exact opposite of what he knew. He nodded in acknowledgement and proceeded to twirl the pasta into his fork and have it.

"So anyways, how about your personal life?" She asked him.

He choked on the pasta after hearing it. He knew that it would be inevitable, but not so soon.

"Why do you ask?" He cleared his throat and questioned her back to see what she would tell him.

"Nothing. It's been a long time since we met, so I was just curious to know what happened in your life, that's all." She evaded the question smoothly.

He took a moment and said, "My sole focus was on writing and writing only. It took years to get here."

'Well, I'm glad you are where you are now." She smirked in confidence.

She picked the bill while he finished the pasta, thinking about that last reaction.

"Ok, Come on. Let's go now, it's late." He stood up, waiting for her.

While they were walking back to the parking lot, he felt a change in her behaviour. She started to look happier. It was noticeable from the moment he told her what his three years were like and now she looked like she achieved something. The shift in her behaviour was confusing, keeping him guessing what she was thinking now.

He started his Mustang and surged through the streets while simultaneously trying to comprehend what led to the sudden change. She closed the windows and suddenly sprayed her perfume on her neck.

No way! This washer signal to tell me that she wants to do it.He realised and hit the brake.

He looked at her like he was cornered. He started the car and began driving slowly, feeling physically tortured like a criminal being interrogated by a cop. He felt like a puppet throughout. And it was starting to feel like he was preyed upon. He remembered Indira's words.First, find out what you want Dhruv.

Just then his phone rang. Before he could pick it up, Joanna handed it to him. It was Indira and his shoulders loosened up after seeing her name lit up on the screen.

"Just a minute." He pulled the car aside and got out to attend the call.

"Hey, I was just thinking about you."

"Oh have I got some news for you!" She chirped in joy.

"If you're so excited, it must be something exciting." He smiled, hearing her in high spirits.

"Bindu wants to see you."

"Is she?" He voiced his excitement.

"I know, I played a video of you on YouTube in an interview and she was surprised when I told her about you." She narrated.

"Ok. So when do I see her?"

"How about the day after tomorrow? Tomorrow I'm taking her to a movie." She said with infectious energy.

"Good. Happy to hear she has your undivided attention." He sighed.

"Okay, I must have called you while you were in the middle of something. I'll see you on the 14th. Bye." She told him.

"Yeah. Can't wait to see you both. Bye." He cut the call with a visible smile on his face.

After a long day this was some good news. He wanted to meet Bindu, Indira's daughter, whom he had met when she was a child raised by a single parent. He got in the car, all happy and up in high spirits. He started the car and continued but there was a noticeable silence since his call.

He looked at Joanna and it felt uneasy, as her silence was disturbing at times. Even though the car now felt larger, quieter and peaceful, the sight of Joanna sitting silently was unsettling.

"So, who was that on the phone Dhruv?" She asked him softly.

He sensed the shift in the tone. It carried a sense of curiosity and jealousy. He side-eyed her and noticed her clutching her purse tightly.Calm before the storm, I see...He focused on the road.

"You don't know Indira Roy, Jo? She even attended our college literary event as a chief guest." He told her, anticipating what her reaction would be.

There was a momentary pause and she sat still before she reacted verbally.

"Oh I know her, but why is she calling you at this time, isn't she a single parent?" She prodded him.

I knew it. It did strike a nerve.He smiled and closed his eyes for a moment.

"Yeah, but she's heaven on earth, the sweetest person you'll ever meet." He gushed.

"OK." She exhaled loudly. "But what is she doing with you?" She hit back.

"She's the reason I have made it so far in writing and I consider her as my mentor." He narrated.

"So who am I? The one who actually inspired you to write in the first place."

He stopped the car as the real conversation had only begun.

"You' ll always be the person who inspired me, Jo. But without Indira I would not have been the person I am now." He stressed.

"Ok. But if you had to choose between Indira and me, who would you pick?" She furrowed her eyebrows.

"What do you mean to choose?" He asked her, visibly confused.

"Just answer the question!" She demanded.

"Indira, without doubt."

She covered her mouth in shock, trying to process that he had actually said what she heard. The gloves were off now.

"Her?! She's way older than you and me! I meanwhat the fuck?!" She was stunned.

"Oh yeah, what about that?" He pressed back.

"Dhruv she'sold. Anyone will think she groomed you. How do you think she's better than me in any aspect?" She leaned back on the seat, giggling trying to suppress her anger.

"If that's the case, then weren't you the one who groomed me? By the way, you're married now Joanna, you think this is better?" He hit back.

He gripped the steering wheel tightly and asked, "Does he know about this?"

"I divorced him long back, Dhruv. I'm no longer married." She held up her hand towards him, showing him that there was no wedding ring.

"That doesn't change anything," He doubled down, "So you thought I would be waiting for you to divorce him. You left me, Joanna. You're the one not me." He exhaled sharply.

"Dhruv, I had no choice." She croaked.

"Joanna, Just don't. You made your choice and I'm ok with it." He leaned back, smiling.

"I had no choice, Dhruv. Believe me, I really didn't." She bawled.

"Admit it, you had the better option and left me, I was younger and not financially stable enough to run a family. I understand that Joanna, you clearly mentioned that the last time we actually met." He turned off the car.

"Dhruv, I tried everything to save us. If I had denied him, I would have lost my parents." She bawled.

"So are your parents here now?" He turned sharply towards her.

"No, they're not." She cried.

"Unbelievable." He got out of the vehicle trying to calm himself.

"Dhruv wait..." She followed him.

"What do you want, Joanna? What?" He rubbed his temple.

"I know you're angry and you have every right to," she sniffled. "But please, hear me out."

"I heard enough, Joanna."

"You don't know the entire story yet." She wiped her eyes, kohl smudged around her eyes.

He turned around with his back facing her, "No Joanna, I think I heard enough and I'm done to be honest."

"FUCK I STILL LOVE YOU DHRUV!!" She screamed.

He turned back, seething in anger.

"Please don't be with her, stay with me." She clutched her chest.

"No. I can't." He walked towards the car and turned back, "The world doesn't wait for you nor does it revolve around you. The Day you walked from us is the day we were done. Nothing changes that or will change that."

He got back in the car. "Now get inside, I'm dropping you home."

There were no words after that. A silence, deafening to be exact. Even though he heard her sniffle and cry, he didn't want to initiate contact as that would bring false hopes. Within an hour they reached her home.

Ruth and Cathy were waiting at the porch, walking towards them the moment the car stopped.

"Took you long enough." Ruth jeered at them.

Joanna got out of the car and rushed home. Both of them stood still, unable to understand what happened.

"Umm... he forgot these..." Dhruv handed them the shopping bags and got back into the car.

"Bye Ruth and Cathy." He waved and started the car.

"But wait... at least come in for a moment." Ruth watched as he drifted into a corner off the street.

He stopped after a good distance and opened all the windows. He turned on the AC to flush out the scent of Joanna.

"I release you from my life Joanna. This is the end." He said to himself.

He started the car and drove back home, finally finding what he wants in life and he realised that it was not her. Today felt like seeing everything about them from another perspective for him.

******

Joanna walked into her room and immediately stepped into the shower. She scrubbed herself aggressively with a loofah to remove the scent from her body like the memory of today. She cried for Dhruv, for them, and what they could have been.