The Bimbo from Outer Space

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"This is a major league bad idea, dude." Amber said as Rob maneuvered his car into the off ramp of the highway. He didn't respond until he had brought the car to a stop at a red light.

"It's water under the bridge as far as I am concerned." He said, not turning to look at her questioning stare.

Amber snorted in derision. "Yeah, a bridge that's on fire maybe."

Robert didn't answer as the light turned green. Amber had been ragging on him about this since he accepted Alice's invitation for a week-long getaway in the woods. Yes, Alice was his ex. And yes, it had been a messy break up that took him a year to get over. But all that was behind him as far as he was concerned. He'd even had his first date since the break up last week. It didn't go anywhere but he felt it marked personal progress.

Amber on the other hand thought that Rob was delusional if he thought that Alice had anything but the worst of intentions with this outing. Alice and her had been best friends since they were both in preschool but it didn't stop Amber from calling Alice out on being a stone cold bitch where men were concerned. Alice was a man eater, a fact she told Rob several times before, during and after his disastrous relationship. Rob was a dopey dude suffering from nice guy syndrome, in her opinion. Alice had forever messed up his psyche when she allowed him to stick his dick in her.

Men,she thought,have two organs they think with and not enough blood to use both. Shit like this is why I'm gay.

The rest of the drive was done in relative silence as Rob navigated the back roads towards the address Alice had given him. Amber knew that nothing she could say would change his mind, so she saved her breath for the inevitable 'I told you so' to come. The weather was warm and the sky was clear, a perfect summer day. It wasn't until he had pulled down a long gravel drive way that Amber spoke up again.

"Last chance to bail before this gets ugly." She said with an air of defeat.

Rob cocked an eyebrow and flashed her a grin. "Why? You offering me pity sex?"

Amber responded by punching him in the arm as hard as she could. Rob yelled and the car almost swerved into a ditch.

"Ow, fuck!" He whined out, a tear glistening in the corner of his eye.

"You asshole." She said moodily then turned away from him. As soon as the car came to a halt in front of a modern cabin, she thrust her door open and jumped out, slamming it extra hard and flipping him the bird with both hands.

That's what I get for hitting on a dyke.He thought miserably. Rob was no fool, whatever Amber might think about him. Part of him did recognize that this was in all likelihood an absolutely terrible idea destined to end in hurt feelings. But the larger part of his ego demanded that he rise to this challenge.I'll prove to her that I'm over it! That I don't need her! That she meant nothing to me!That's what he thought when he first got the emailed invitation. Now, however, sitting here in her driveway, staring up at her front door, that conviction wavered.

"Can't turn back now..." He muttered out loud to himself. It was not as reassuring as he hoped it would make him feel.

The cabin was a sturdy looking building made out of thick dark logs of wood, though Rob noticed the modern windows and the AC unit hooked up on the side of the cabin. The porch was made out of cedar and looked clean and polished. All around the cabin were slate stones and gravel, making a path to a back patio area with a fire pit built in. He also noticed the presence of a gas grill and outdoor refrigerator.All the comforts of home.He thought somewhat bitterly. He didn't know why he thought it would be more rustic. Alice's parents were loaded and they loved to flaunt it. It was a little before one in the afternoon as he stepped out and proceeded to grab all the luggage the pair of them had packed.

Amber had already climbed the steps of the porch and was knocking on the front door. Rob took a deep breath to steady his nerves before he trudged after her. After a few moments, Amber knocked again on the door then peered through the window on the door. There was no other car in the driveway and she was wondering if Alice was even here.It would be just like her to invite us up and then show up a day late.Suddenly the door swung open to reveal a tall, well muscled, slightly sweaty shirtless man with long brown hair. Amber, who found herself at eye level with his abs, jumped back a step at his sudden appearance. Rob froze mid step on the stairs.

"Yuh? What ya want dudes?" He said in a deep slurred tone, idly scratching at his crotch with one hand and leaning in the door frame. He looked deeply annoyed at their presents and had a rumpled look of someone who had just thrown on clothes to deal with a sudden unexpected disturbance.

Rob's mind went completely blank as he stared at this unanticipated male presence. His mouth flapped open and closed a few times but no words came out. Luckily, Amber was quicker to recover from her shock.

"Wrong house!" she shouted and then began to scramble back towards the car. She grabbed Rob's limp arm and started dragging him back as quickly as she could.Not good! Not good! Oh god this bitch better not...Amber's line of thought was interrupted when a bubbly voice called out from behind them.

"O-M-G Todd! I told you my friends were coming today!"

Rob stopped dead in his tracks. Amber groaned internally. Alice flounced out of the cabin, hastily pulling a shirt down over her mid riff. She was wearing a tank top and panties and looked as rumpled as Todd did. She jogged over to Amber and gave her an overly enthusiastic hug. Amber did not return the hug, choosing to remain limp in her arms.Todd scowled them.

. "Ugh, why did you want me to answer the door if you knew it was going to be them?" He asked sullenly.

"Just what the hell are you up too?" Amber whispered into Alice's ear, staring daggers at the shirtless man in the doorway. Alice only squeezed her tightly and then turned to face Rob.

"It sooooo good you could make it Bobby!" She exclaimed, flashing him her most dazzling smile. Rob didn't know how to react, his brain was still short circuiting at the sight of a post coitus Alice and her new boy toy. He tried to wave casually but only managed to lift his arm up a few inches before it flopped limply back at his side.

"You always know just what to say, Bobby." Alice said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. She then slid an arm around Amber's shoulder and started walking with her up to the cabin. Alice was making sure to wiggle her hips as much as possible, making her ass jiggle with every step. Amber turned her head back to look at Rob and mouthed the word 'run'.

Rob's brain finally restored communication with his mouth. "Well it's great to see you too!" He said much too loud to sound casual. Amber dragged a hand over her face and Alice just kept smiling, not looking back at all.Todd observed all of this with a mild kind of disinterest, though he did give Amber the once over.

Oh yeah, this is a fantastic start to this vacation.Rob thought.

Several hours later, after Rob and Amber had gotten settled in, they were all seated outside around an outdoor firepit watching the sun set and the stars coming out. At least that's what they were supposed to be doing. Instead Amber was watching Rob, who in turn was watching Alice, who was apparently trying her hardest to suck Todd's tongue out of his mouth. Todd for his part was doing the best to see the sunset, but his crazy girlfriend wouldn't let him go. Or breath.

It had been a hellish afternoon from Rob's perspective. After Alice showed him and Amber where their rooms were, she disappeared with Todd, who looked none too pleased to have Rob in the cabin at all. Several minutes later, a series of loud thumping and moaning had commenced. It went on for several minutes, then quieted down for a bit before starting up all over again. Amber had come over to Rob's room almost immediately after Alice had left.

"Man, just leave. Don't do this to yourself."

"Do what?" Rob asked in an innocent sounding voice before the moans and thumps started up again. His eye twitched involuntarily in time with each thump that rattled the walls.

"Suit yourself bucko." She replied in a sad tone before leaving him alone with his thoughts. Rob stewed in a mix of self pity and defiance.I'm not letting her get to me.He thought as his teeth started grinding together. Several times he got up and made to knock on the door he knew Alice and Todd were behind. But his nerves didn't allow him to actually make a move. And so he slunk back down the corridor each time. Amber saw him pass by her open door more than once but never moved to offer him any form of comfort. She firmly believed he was in a hell of his own making. One that he could leave at any time.

Around four in the afternoon, the orgasm train must have hit its last stop because Alice emerged from her love den and began striking up a conversation with Amber who was watching TV in the living room. It was a nothing conversation, consisting of the usual small talk and catching up that happens between two friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time. Amber was being polite but privately wondered what it would feel like if she slapped the crap out of her long time friend. Rob lurked around the corner and tried desperately to think of some clever casual topic of conversation that would let Alice know that he wasn't bothered in the slightest about the recent goings on, but his guts turned to ice and his legs turned to jello whenever he tried to actually go talk to her. And so he had eventually settled for laying on the bed in his room, staring up at the ceiling and going over his life choices. Around six thirty, Todd headed into the kitchen for a beer and a leftover sandwich. Alice took this moment to loudly suggest that they all head out and enjoy the sunset. And thus...

Rob couldn't even bear to look at Alice as she slurped and sucked Todd's face. She was going to town, making a huge show of the endeavor. Amber, who wasn't in a state of denial, noticed that Todd didn't really seem to be that into it. Alice constantly had to keep moving his hands onto her body after he let them drop away. Privately, Todd was over it. Alice had told him they were meeting old friends at the cabin last night, giving him no time to say no as she begged him to come so she could 'show him off.' The fuck fest this morning had been nice, but then she was like a wild woman in the afternoon, demanding more and more crazy positions and telling him to be louder. He had been dating Alice for the last two months and he knew that she was a wild child, but this was becoming a whole new level of crazy. He could barely get a gasp of air in before she was climbing on top of him and practically sucking his eyes out through his mouth.

"Got any beer?" Amber casually inquired suddenly.

"Yes!" Todd shouted, yanking his head out of Alice's grip while she was momentarily distracted. "Let me show you where it's at!"

"She knows where the kitchen is!" Alice whined at him but it was no use, he was already leading Amber back to the house, taking long quick strides.

"You coming Rob?" Amber pointedly asked but Rob mutely shook his head no. She fantasized about knocking him out and throwing him in the back of the car before she turned and headed into the house. Alice pouted her lips as she watched Todd walk away, severely annoyed that he seemed to be getting tired of her. Suddenly, it dawned on her that she was alone with Rob, the first time since he got here. It was something she had avoided doing all day as it wasn't in her game plan till later.

"Isn't he just to die for?" She said in a thick and gooey tone. "He's such a studmuffin." She sighed deeply, hoping she was laying it on thick enough.

"Does he make you happy?" Rob asked.

The question made Alice start. For the first time that day, she directly locked eyes with him. "What?" She asked, sure she had misheard him.

"Nothing." He said in an empty tone. He stood up, stretched and then said, "I'mma go for a walk." And without waiting for a reply, he started walking away down the driveway.

A few minutes later, Amber came back with two cold beers.

"Todd said he needed to take a shower. He'll be back in a few."

"Sure, whatever." Alice said distractedly as she took the offered beer but didn't drink it. Amber looked around and then asked, "Where'd Rob go?"

"Said he was going for a walk." Alice said, her brows furrowed in thought.

"Oh good." Amber said and then kicked Alice's chair out from under her.

"Ahh!" Alice screamed as she tumbled to the ground. Her butt slammed into the slate stones hard enough to hurt her tail bone. She scrambled to get back on her feet. "You crazy bitch!" She screamed at Amber.

"Shove it, twat face. Just what the fuck are you doing?" Amber said, casually retaking her own chair by the fire. The flames danced in the reflection of her irises.

"What are you talking about, you asshole!" Alice was still screaming as she pawed at her hair trying to remove the detritus that was caught up in her blond locks as a result of her fall.

"I'm talking about inviting your ex, whom you know was head over heels in love with you, over to your summer cabin and then spending every second whoring yourself out to your new dick buddy."

"Oh I'm sorry! Would you prefer if I just slept with you instead, lezbo?" Alice spat out.

"Alice..." Amber said in a warning tone, "you are my oldest friend in the world. You stuck by me when my parents threw me out. But if you don't tell me what your end goal here is, I'm going to drag you out into the woods, shave your head and leave you tied to a tree for the bears to chew on." Amber took a long cool drink from her beer while Alice thought that over.

"It's for his own good." Alice finally said in a pouting tone, plopping herself in a chair next to Amber.

"In what way is you fucking another guy in front of Rob for his own good?" Amber scoffed in disbelief at her.

"Because that dope wouldn't leave me alone after we broke up! He plagued me for months afterwards! Calls, texts, emails, even a freaking letter. A hand written letter!" Alice said, getting fired up at the memories. There had been other guys that had whined after she dumped them, but none went to the lengths that Rob had gone to.

"Correction," Amber said, lifting a finger. "After you dumped him with no warning, then took a five day trip to the Bahamas and had a three some which you posted about online."

"What about it? I was single!"

"For all of about six hours!" Amber drained the rest of her beer then tossed the can into the fire. "What did you see in him in the first place?"

Alice smiled sweetly. "He was cute."

Amber looked at her in disbelief. "Thats it? Cute?"

Alice shrugged. "I'd been with plenty of hot and hunky guys and I wanted to try cute."

"So why'd you dump him?" Amber had a pretty good idea why but she wanted to hear her say it.

"Because I decided hot and hunky was better."

"And now you've decided you need to help him get over you."

"Yup."

"By fucking a guy infront of him."

"Yup."

"Holy shit you're screwed up in the head."

Alice glared at Amber. "Look, one of my friends told me about his latest date. Did you know he whined about how much of a bitch I was for the entire thing? I mean, get over it already! What a moron!"

Amber said nothing. She hadn't heard that little fact before but it didn't surprise her.

"This is for his own good. Once he gets over me, he'll meet some new girl that will blow his mind and change his world. I just know it!"

"You're certifiably insane." Amber replied before she got up and started walking around the house.

"Where are you going now?" Alice called out.

"To find Rob and get the hell outta this nut house." Amber called out over her shoulder before she rounded the corner.

Rob trudged down the road, not looking where he was going, lost in his own thoughts. He was kicking a rock down the road as he walked, listening to its clatter on the asphalt. He felt like the biggest jerk in the whole world right now. How could he be so foolish, so stupid to think this was ever a good idea.Amber was right. What did I expect? A hearty handshake and a pat on the back? She dumped me for no reason! Then she ghosts me. Then she...He was so caught up in his own self pity that he failed to notice a small green streak in the sky that was slowly getting bigger and bigger.

I'm a damn joke. I should be on my hands and knees thanking her for ever allowing a guy like me even near her, let alone to fuck her.His dick gave a sympathetic throb. It too hadn't seen too much action since the break up. It was hard though to forget how amazing Alice was in the sack. She was wild and vivacious, screaming and moaning sweet nothings into his ear as she rode his cock. Her pussy had been a tight moist hole that promised to fulfill every man's deepest aching desires. And when she gave you a blow job, the way she wrapped her tongue around his pole and teased his tip...

It's gone! She's gone! We should've never been together in the first place! I gotta move on! The next girl is right around the corner and I've got to make sure that... What's that sound?He was shaken from his thoughts by a soft whistling sound that was getting louder and louder with each passing second. Suddenly there was a loud metallic screeching sound. It seemed to be coming from behind him, but as he turned around he couldn't see a thing in the road behind him. Subsequently, he was facing the wrong direction when a large metallic saucer roughly the size of a semi truck came smashing into the wood a few feet off the road. The screeching sound had come from a cell tower it had clipped on its way down. He did notice the huge crashing sound of metal tearing against wood and when he spun back around, he could see a burning wreck somewhere up the road.

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Rob ran towards the burning wreckage. He wasn't quite sure just what had transpired in the last few seconds, but the thought that someone might be hurt spurred him into action. Once he got up close, however, he quickly realized that he was out of his depth. Wreckage was spread over a vast area and fires were burning, some of them with strange green flames. Broken and smashed trees lay scattered all about, adding to the confusion. Worst of all, he couldn't see anything that looked like a car. Large chunks of metal and what looked like complex machinery was scattered about every which way.

And then he saw her.

She was sitting in a strange looking seat that had somehow separated from the rest of the wreck relatively unscratched. An X shaped harness was holding her upright in the seat but her head was lolled to one side. A long sheet of silvery hair was obscuring her face but he could see she was wearing what looked like a skin tight one piece bathing suit made out of a shining reflective material. A large belt was strapped around her wide hips that held various pouches. What was really weirding him out however was the fact that she wasn't wearing any shoes. He could see her bare feet and that the nails on her feet and her hands were painted some kind of shining iridescent chrome color.

"Uh... Ma'am are you alright?" Rob called out lamely, not quite sure what the protocol would be in a situation like this. Something about not moving crash victims flashing in his mind but not much else. The woman in the seat didn't so much as twitch. He was regretting leaving his phone back in the cabin. He suddenly felt very isolated and absolutely alone.Damn it, what the hell am I going to do? I mean... she looks ok... ish...Rob moved a little closer and called out again but the woman didn't move at all. He got right in front of her and reached out to touch her head.