Deceptive Bends

I had been divorced from my ex about a year, I had caught her in a lie and in a short twenty minutes had sent her packing, quite literally, after she got back from her fuck fest with Roger big bollocks Adam. She worked with him and he sure worked on her. Anyway that was so last year and it being Friday evening, I was suddenly alone for the weekend. It was unplanned, I was supposed to be away with the boys on a golfing weekend, well there wasn't going to be much golf, but there would be booze and women, Josh had promised. Then he'd phoned around four to say that three of the group had pulled out and his wife Helene was pressuring him to call it off anyway. We agreed it was a bust and I realised I didn't have a thing in to eat so I'd now have to go shopping if I wanted to eat this weekend. I could leave it til Saturday and get a takeaway, but I had takeaway last night.

I was passing an Aldi and the entrance was at the next corner, so I swung in and parked. I found a pound coin to release the trolley and wandered in. As a bachelor I knew it was easy to slip into not eating properly and living on takeaways. That had lasted a few months after I threw Julia out, then when my trousers started to get a bit difficult to button I grew up as well as out. I started at a gym, looked at what I was eating and soon had the belly under control. I found I actually enjoyed the burn. So now I did weights and a cardio session, swam and felt so in control, my life coach said I had done well and it was because I had stepped back at just the right time.

Anyway I was wandering round, popping all the good stuff in the trolley, salad, vegetables, lean meat, a small loaf. I rarely eat bread more than once a day now. I also don't drink alcohol, so this weekend would have been a rare departure from my normal tea-total life. I felt better, looked better than before my divorce. I slipped in a few tins of tuna and salmon in spring water and moved down the aisle. Crash, my trolley hit by another one swung away at forty five degrees. I dragged it back ready to make a tart remark, when a voice I knew interrupted my mouths opening gambit.

"I'm so sorry I... Mike!"

"Julia, what the f..."

I trailed off, she had her trolley with a baby carrier, strapped to it was a car seat and a sleeping baby lay in it.

"Hi, yea a baby, this is Tyler, he's about seven months old, cute huh?"

"Well all babies are cute but yes, he's exceptionally cute, yours and Rogers?"

She shook her head slowly, biting her bottom lip with her top teeth this is Julia thinking, I knew that look. She looked at me for a couple of seconds, I reddened,

"could we talk, I mean I'd understand if you say no. I mean I've no right to ask this, but I really would appreciate a chance to talk about us, err what happened to us that is, if you could... bear. To. Talk... if you would..."

She stalled and blushed then shrugged. Just then Tyler wriggled and moaned, then his lips kind of flubbered, I mean, it was like he blew air out and his lips vibrated, then he smiled that crooked no teeth smile and settled.

"Yeas sure, I mean why not it's been a... what year or so, it might be good to settle this between us. I mean we never saw each other after..."

"You can say it Mike, you caught me in a lie, with Rogers cum leaking out of me and you threw me out. No disputing the facts. I fucked up literally. There were however, more consequences than you know and I would like to give you all the facts. Not that it changes anything but I would like to tell you the full story. Like I said, you don't have to say yes, you can just tell me to drop it and I'll understand. If it was the other way on, I think I'd tell you to go fuck yourself, but that's just me."

"Well since you put it so eloquently, what can I say but yes, okay, let's talk. I could never tell you to fuck off now could I. I never said it that night, I won't say it now. However, I have groceries, as do you and I bet Master Tyler has an appetite he'll need fixing when he wakes, so how about you come over to my place about half seven, you can bring Tyler if you want,"

"still living at Rivendale Road?"

I nodded, she smiled, I leaned over and pecked her cheek. She smiled, my heart lurched and we parted. We saw each other a couple of times as we strolled round the aisles. Each time she smiled and did a little wave, I grinned and return the little wave with my own. I finally reached the self check out, paid and left. I put the bags in the boot, got in and moved off home. All the time I had this picture of her and baby Tyler. That hadn't been on my "Julia you slutty bitch" bingo card that I carried mentally for if we met by chance.

I had managed to remember her favourite soft drink was J2O Apple and Mango, so I had purchased two, four bottle cases and I stuck them in the spare fridge in the kitchen, it used to be the wine cooler, but I had no wine now, so I used it for non alcoholic beers and gin, tonic water cans and some soft drinks, Pepsi, Coke, that sort of thing. I slung in my cans of Guinness 0.0, not quite the same taste but closer than most.

I began to prepare a light meal, got it prepped and left it ready in the fridge, took myself upstairs and showered, changed and came down to find an old beat up Mazda pulling onto my drive. It sat behind my Audi and settled with creaks and groans. Julia stepped out and opened the rear door behind the driver, she fiddled for a few moments, then lifted out the familiar car seat. So Tyler would be there too. Somehow this seemed right, that little baby was a calming influence on us both, or had been at the supermarket. And there was no denying the kid was cute, very cute.

I opened the door as she reached it, she jumped slightly and giggled, that was a sound I remembered, I said hi, she said hi, we kissed cheeks as she moved to pass me. I grabbed the car seat and held it as she smiled at me. I pointed to the lounge as she looked and waited.

"So same old decor then, I have the dining table and chairs, they're still in storage, haven't quite managed to find a place to call home yet."

She shrugged and smiled, I set the car seat on the coffee table, she reached over and lifted the blanket off him, smiling, touching his cheeks and being his mum. I loved how she fussed around him, whatever else she was being the best mum she could, as far as I can see.

"Can I get you a drink, I've got some of the J2O Apple and Mango you used to love?"

"oh god yes, it's been a while since I had that, some ice too please."

I nodded disappeared out and got her drink, poured a Guinness for me and took the drinks back in, to find her with Tyler latched onto her left boob, suckling away, one bright blue eye, like hers diffidently eying me, little hands pumping her breast.

"sorry, he needed feeding, I'm still doing the donkey work, he's a little guzzler, but it works for me."

I put her drink down and sat opposite her, on a sofa, she settled back and deftly switched from her left to her right breast. Using a free hand to pull her bra cup over her distended nipple. I blushed, not so much embarrassed as guilty at her having to reveal herself to me. She reached over to a small bag on the coffee table, extracting a small circular pad, slipping her bra cup open, she placed the circular tissue over her nipple and areola, before reseating the cup over her boob and clipping it in place. I looked at her face.

"It always leaks a little, despite his attempts to drain me dry, so the tissue cap stops it leaking through my bra then my top, perils of motherhood. Is this okay by the way, not embarrassing you am I?"

"Absolutely not, they're what they were designed for, I do worry it is embarrassing you though, I mean having to bare the boobs to the ex."

"Mike, it's okay, after having him, I'm a lot less fussy about a lot of things, including getting my tits out to feed him. As you say it's what they're designed for. So how are you, what are you doing, how's it all been?"

I cleared my throat, and sat back, took a sip of my beer and thought for a second.

"to be very honest, it hurt like fuck, your betrayal, after all we had. I wondered if it was me, was I not attentive enough, good enough in bed, how had I fucked up the relationship. Why hadn't we talked, why hadn't you said, what was it that happened to go so wrong between us? I let myself go, booze, bad choices in eating. Then I thought no, I'm not doing this, so I went to the gym, got into a pattern, hired a life coach and sorted my head out. I believe we both let it go, so I stopped hating you, stopped hating me and just dived into work and exercise."

She sat there tears falling down her cheeks, she nodded, then took Tyler off her boob, new cap, bra done up, buttoned up her dress, tucked a muslin cloth over her shoulder, laid Tyler against it and gently patted his back, rubbed it and he gave a series of belches, each a little louder until with a belch that started in his toes erupted and his crinkly smile appeared, his beautiful eyes closed and he dropped off into a deep sleep. She moved him into his car seat, tucked the cloth round his body and sat back down.

"I'll need to change him in a while, is it okay to do it in here or should I use your bathroom?"

"In here is fine, but now tell me your story. Start when you met Roger big bollocks?"

"I'll start by letting you know that his bollocks were really quite ordinary, but that's just for the record. Additionally, I'll have to stop using that phrase, as will you, if and when he starts taking more notice of what we're saying. I know that presupposes that we'll carry on talking but it's got to be said now, before little ears hear and a little mouth says it to Nanny and Granddad, understand?"

"I understand and thank you for pointing out the normality of his testicles, contrary to what I believed."

She grinned then grabbed her drink, took a delicate pull at it and settled back, drink in hand.

"I suppose our life had reached that plateau, we were complicit in it with each other, we both took the other for granted. Sex was becoming a bit vanilla, not like when we met. Perhaps I was too naive to understand everyone goes through it. We settle down, we rub along, things aren't as exciting as when we lived apart. I could see you naked any day, you could see me, the surprise and wow factor was diminishing."

She paused to take a sip of her drink, wriggled on the sofa to make herself more comfortable. Looking directly at me she held my gaze as she languidly talked to me.

"I was too young and probably too stupid to realise that this was how our lives transitioned. I wonder if you felt the same, well I didn't ask and you never said. I was feeling like I had switched my exciting sex life for a humdrum suburban ordinary one. Not that you didn't rock my boat. When we actually found the time to make love, it was astronomical, like always. I was afraid you found me less attractive now we were married. You didn't grab me or touch me at inappropriate moments anymore. We never fucked like it was our last fuck. I didn't know how to step it up again. I felt helpless and lonely. My wonderful life was slowly going down the plug hole."

She sniffed and I moved to be beside her, to comfort her, but she held her palm up to stop me.

"Not yet MiKe, there's so much more, I was unhappy at home. Roger was new and kind of attached himself to me, said we seemed like two peas in a pod. I admit I was flattered. We spoke daily at coffee break, had lunch together. He told me his wife had insisted on their move here. She wanted him to go up the corporate ladder at speed, this move would be rung three of seven. Seven was a board seat by the time he was fifty, he was thirty seven now, so about six years older than us. I told him about us and how our idyllic marriage was slowly going into decline, how I couldn't talk to you, didn't know how to approach it."

She stopped again, took another sip and wiped her hand across her face. So un-Julialike, but a little endearing. She looked at me and smiled, nodding slowly.

"Yup, things change I realise that now. I spend less time on me and loads more on Tyler. I've come to realise too that the passion of youth become the deep abiding love of older ages. I missed that connection and that was my downfall. You however, my beloved ex are blameless for what happened, because you were trying to build a love that would sustain us into our dotage. Yes you should have spoken more about your feelings, but ha, you're a man and feelings ain't your thing, until pushed to extremes. Anyway back to the story. Old Roge, was sympathetic, arm round my shoulder, I'm your work buddy and I'm here for you. Tell me if it hurts for you,I'll be your rock.

If it gets to much, blah, blah, blah, day after day, drip, drip, drip, oh he did a number on me for sure. I fell for it. He got me to duck out of the girls night and took me for a meal, unfortunately his wife, who was supposed to come, had to rush away to see her sick mum. We ate, we talked, he told me how beautiful I looked, persuaded me to go dancing. We danced continuously until he dropped me back at my car at eleven. Next day more treacle, I see it now, didn't then. There was a man who adored me for me. I was a sucker for his words,"

She sat back and a tear ran down her cheek,

"he did it again the next month proposed that we went out together, I called the girls cancelled, work overloading me, couldn't get away etc, etc, etc. Came home got changed, you assumed, I didn't offer, I hated it, but here lay a night of fun and carelessness. We went out had a few drinks, no meal, then on to a club, where we danced, he got close, hugged me, kissed my cheeks, felt my arse, I loved it. His hands found my boobs and I was in heaven, but it was late, so I said that I needed to go home, to preserve the lie of meeting the girls. He was charm itself, of course, naturally, sorry to put me in that position. I felt a buzz in my pussy that hadn't been there for a while, not since the last time you made love to me. It seemed too long ago. Anyway, at work, he got me on his team, we were now working, lunching and coffee breaking together, he was in my ear and when we were alone, he was kissing me and groping me. I was so confused, maybe marriage was a mistake, maybe we should just have gone on as lovers. Maybe I should make Roger as my lover. And..."

She paused and took a drink,

"There it was, I was considering an affair, I had gone from your average straight little girl to slutty hot wife, without realising how quickly he'd seduced me. Five weeks from arriving.Then he told me he had a room at the Inn booked, he wanted me, he knew I needed to explore my true sexual nature. I could be a very powerful women with the ability to seduce any man I wanted, even my stupid husband who didn't appreciate what a sexual woman I was. He worshipped me, would crawl a hundred yards over broken glass just to kiss my hand."

Tears began in earnest now, but again she held me off with her palm up

"I have to get this out Mike, I have to tell you everything. That night I again cried off with the girls, same excuse same bullshit, I also turned my phone off, just in case you called, just in case you broke my resolve to fuck Roger. I got there, he was there, we had a meal in the bar, a few drinks then back to his room. I have to admit I was still ambivalent about it but I went ahead and fucked him, I played away, broke my vows. I need to tell you, despite his excessive foreplay in the previous weeks, he was a wham-bam-thank you mam sort of guy. No preliminaries, clothes off, on my back him bouncing up and down on me. He's yelling how turned on he is by me, grunting, it was awful. I suddenly saw what I'd done as he came inside me. He rolled off and rolled over and was soon asleep. I cried, I cried bitterly, I really had fucked up. Even worse I hadn't planned at all for the aftermath. No comb, no makeup bag, I wanted out, so no time for a shower. By then it was gone midnight and I had to race back. Everything depended on you having gone to bed and being asleep."

she wriggled again and finished her drink, Tyler chose then to cry out in his sleep and start to fuss. Picking him up, I walked round the room, cradling this fragile being at my chest. I rocked him gently, I wanted this for so long, a baby, a baby that belonged to me. I felt the tears, as Tyler quietened down. I lay him gently in his seat and he burbled a bit then settled back.

"Your a natural, you'll be a great dad. You didn't wait, you saw to his needs, that so loveable. It's what drew me to you all those years ago."

I nodded and took her glass and asked if she wanted another, she said yes I finished my beer, took the empty glasses and refilled them. I felt her behind me, she was red eyed and tearful, I handed her the glass and she kissed my cheek. We wandered back to the lounge and sat, this time I sat beside her, she put down her glass, laid her hand just above my knee and started again.

"I got back to the hotel and made up some story about an argument and a lost keycard. They smiled in acknowledgement, grinning at the stupid little girl who'd lost her lover. The room was paid for and so they cut a card and I was able to sleep that night, not well not at all well. I had taken all the cases in and the duffel bag, so I had makeup and a change of clothes for the morning.

Work was a nightmare, Roger wasn't in the group area, some meeting with the executive. Then I get called to HR, I went in totally unprepared for what happened. I was told that my 'affair' could destabilise the company, Roger was bullet proof, turned out his wife was the youngest daughter of a Regional big wig. He was cast as the poor fool who was duped by me. I had until two pm to clear my desk and get out. I cried as I dragged my sorry arse back to my desk. I told them what happened, two of the other women went very quiet, looked at each and left. Half an hour later, I got another call to HR. This time I was the offended party, they had no idea, blah, blah, blah, no need to make a scene, old job back, no stain on my record, salary hike by five grand a year, no loss of status. Turns out Roger was working his way around the department, those two had the Roger experience, he forced them into silence, but after what he did to me, they went straight to HR."

She patted my leg and smiled, I still loved that smile, whatever it said about me, I still loved that gorgeous smile. I looked at Tyler, yea he had it too.

"So final leg, I was there when he left the office, jeered by everyone, but by then I had my own problems. I went to HR and explained the situation, they were helpful, who knew. Anyway, they found me a solicitor to handle our divorce, he said I needn't attend the hearings it was all procedural. I accepted that. He advised me at each stage what happened and what came next. He also said you never went either, then I got the letter from the Court granting a divorce absolute and all that remained was the odds and ends of of closing our marriage out, the funds transfer, collecting the bits and pieces.

A few weeks after we parted I started to get sick in the mornings, weird I thought, told a friend at work, she took me to Boots the Chemists, found the packs, took two different ones, I paid, we went back and I pee'd on them. Bingo, double positive, both had a plus on them. I was pregnant. Fuck my life, that was the divorce bonus from hell. Now you know and I know that at best I'm a bit ditzy with my pill taking, so I guess with the stress of everything and the affair I just forgot to take them, I was pretty fertile apparently. Anyway, long story short, two choices, I took the second and here he is my little monster. No fathers name on the birth certificate, just mum and him. Registered him in my maiden name, since I reverted to that after the divorce. And now we're up to date and you can laugh and send me on my way, thanks for listening."