Wrecking the Homewrecker

Jason's epilogue

Moving far away from that place which had been dorky sissy hell for three long months had come as a blessing for Jason It allowed him to rest a little easier, to stop fearing Sally's wrath despite her father's protection. Hell even leaving everything and everyone he had ever known behind had been a relief as he dreaded their reactions to him now more than anything. He hadn't even tried to get his old phone back, not wanting to deal with whatever it was his old friends might have sent him over the summer, a lot of them probably worried especially now that he wouldn't be showing up at college anymore either. It stung, and he was going to miss a lot of them, but it was so much easier than having to have all those awkward mortifying conversations regarding his summer and how he now looked. He just couldn't deal with that so starting anew was by far the easiest solution which prevented a lot of shame, but didn't actually do anything to fix his life after Sally had screwed with it for way too long.

Building a life as close to his old life as he possibly could, getting back into the things he used to enjoy or love proved nearly impossible. With everything he had tried he had been forced to face defeat after defeat starting with one of his most basic needs and private past times, masturbating. With his libido cranked up to the max, the need to get off frequently had been more pressing than ever. He hadn't been able to wait to get off on his own terms again after such a long time of only cumming whenever Sally or the guy he was serving fucked him nice and hard. It had actually been one of the very first things he had done with his freedom only to end up feeling devastated.

Putting on some porn he used to love of a hot girl getting a rough pounding didn't have the effect he had hoped at all. Rather than feeling his cock grow and throb as he lusted over the girl, he couldn't help but feel his ass clench in anticipation as he found himself drawn to that cock pounding her pussy, moaning a little as his butt clenched again in anticipation for a rough fuck like that. It was horrifying and he tried to focus on the woman, but that didn't nearly seem to work him up quite that much, not until his eyes drifted down to her stocking clad feet and he imagined what they would smell like, feel like all warm and damp pressed up against his face.

Mortified Jason had tried to cast his eyes back at the woman's breasts swaying with every hard thrust, her pussy, her pretty face seemingly riddled with pleasure, but time and time again his eyes drifted back to her feet, or that cock as he grew a little too excited imagining their smell or what that pounding would feel like where he used to imagine how great it would feel to pound her pussy like that. When he kept on running into the same embarrassing obstacles he had tried to find another video, another favourite of two hot women making out and playing with each other's pussies, removing cock from the equation. Only to find himself grow most excited about looking at their feet once more. When he turned to a video of a woman masturbating with her feet out of the shot instead he couldn't help but feel his thoughts drift towards how it would feel to fuck himself with that toy and once he finally found something to look at with no feet, no cocks, or no toys in sight, just a hot girl rubbing her pussy it just wasn't nearly as exciting as those other video's. All his favourite porn was turning him on for all the wrong reasons till he gave up and tried to avoid that confrontation by just making due with masturbation alone, trying to prevent his mind from going to any of those mortifying places.

What seemed to turn him on was far from his biggest problem though. The biggest issue by far, or the smallest one depending on how you looked at it was his cock, or what was left of it that was. Through hormones and increasingly small cages it had gone from decent to down right tiny, about the size of his elongated bright pink nipples, a little bit smaller even. He couldn't wrap his hand around it the best he could do was grab it with his thumb and index finger, but no matter how hard or fast he tugged on it he couldn't get it any firmer than his nipples were either. It felt good, great even, the nerve endings were all still there, but it didn't grow, or even swell in the slightest bit and without that he might as well have been toying with his nipples which thanks to the hormones were about as sensitive and pleasurable to touch as his cock was.

He had some how hoped that if he got the blood pumping again it would grow right back to it's old length and grith like a balloon, but after trying long and hard he finally had to admit defeat. Which came with the awful realisation that sex was out of the question for him. If he couldn't even jerk off his cock then there was no way he would be able to fuck a girl. Hell even if somehow someway he managed to get it hard it was just too small. All the tugging and rubbing of the useless little nub had done was turned him on even more and as he did, his gaping ass had been begging for attention, clenching harder and faster as if it was looking for something to be stuffed with. He had been desperate to resist, desperate to reclaim his manhood, but all his attempted masturbation and cranked up libido had done was sexually frustrate him to the point where he had given in and stuffed a finger up his bottom past his plumped up anal ring just to get off like he so desperately craved.

Rubbing his prostate had worked quickly where rubbing his useless cock and watching porn had failed which was nothing short of devastating for the masculine self image he was desperately trying to reclaim worst of all was the fact that shoving just one finger up his bottom had left his ass feeling rather empty and yearning for more, yearning to be really filled. He would need at least three fingers, a toy with some grith, or a cock which was much bigger than his own and which did grow hard for it to really feel satisfactory, at least physically satisfactory that was. To make matters even worse he couldn't help but feel the urge to take care of his arousal multiple times a day. He tried to ignore it, knowing what he needed to do to get off, but as he got too worked up, arousing thoughts started plaguing his mind, and those thoughts constantly revolved around either cocks, or when he tried to think of a woman, a pair of smelly feet, forcing him to take care of his arousal to get rid of those mortifying thoughts which in turn left him fingering his ass once more. The orgasms were anything but satisfactory like the once he used to have under Sally's control, but he refused to use more fingers or buy himself a toy feeling bad enough over the one finger as it was.

While devastating his rather frequent new masturbation habits were far from the only thing keeping Jason from reclaiming at least some semblance of a masculine self image. His own reflection kept on bothering him big time as well. He had worked hard on trying to reclaim some semblance of masculinity in how he looked, but it was way harder than he had ever expected it to be. After his time with Sally, going anywhere in public was a terrifying prospect. He just felt so embarrassed all the time unable to stop thinking about what people must be thinking of him. He couldn't stand to meet people's eye and as such he kept defaulting on his habit of looking at guy's crotches, or women's feet. It was awful especially when it came with thought of what was hiding underneath, what would those feet smell like? How big were those cocks hiding in those pants? As embarrassing as those thoughts were, they also turned him on, leaving him in need of another orgasm even sooner. It was messed up, but he just didn't have the courage to meet someone's eye despite trying multiple times which only made going anywhere where he ran the possibility of seeing anyone all the more terrifying.

At least he hadn't needed to leave the house for the very first thing he needed to try to look more like a guy again, some new clothes. None of his old clothes properly fit him anymore, but finding something that did fit ended up being rather tricky. The constant waist training had left his waist positively tiny especially after Sally had the fat cells there sucked away while he was under for the operation on his nose. Something he hadn't really noticed with how he barely had any fat on his body by then. Sally had been underwhelmed by the results as well as it had reduced his waist by maybe another half an ich at most, but now that he was trying to pick his life back up, it was a mortifying change for Jason to deal with. His ass had already looked big compared to his waist giving the idea that he had some curves, but ever since getting out of Sally's clutches it had only become worse. Getting to eat real food rather than his sissy diet from those awful bottles had been amazing which had lead to him gaining a little bit of weight all of which had seemed to go straight to his butt and his chest had gotten a little bit puffier as well, but not nearly as out spoken as his bottom.

Jason would never have to worry about getting a belly, but he would have to prevent himself from gaining weight as all it did was make him lean more towards a rather bottom heavy womanly figure which he blamed on the waist training again. Whatever the fact it was another thing he needed to deal with and asides from making his reflection that much more confronting when naked, it also made finding proper clothes a pain. All the pants he had bought while baggy were way, way too big in the waist when he bought a size which fit over his ass. Not a single brand had a proper fit until he reluctantly tried a pair of women's pants out of desperation which did fit both his hips and waist.

He hated that he had to wear women's pants, but men's pants looked even more ridiculous on him. Then again these women's pants, asides from the already mortifying fact that they were for women, also accentuated his ass way too much, even the baggy ones and the pockets were way too small to put anything into. They were still the better option though, at least the plainest baggiest jeans were. In order to fix the way they made his butt looked, he had tried going for t-shirts a couple of sizes too large to hang down past his bottom, but with his slender limbs and the rest of his look that only made it look like he was wearing his boyfriend's t-shirts, the same was true for hoodies much to his shame once again leaving a proper fit as the least worst option despite it showing off his jeans clad bottom. At least male t-shirts fit him just fine and the model also hid the narrowness of his waist making his bottom stand out a little less than when he was naked. One problem he did have with his t-shirts though were his nipples, for one they were way too sensitive for the coarse material, but worse still, they poked two very pronounced tents in the front of his t-shirt unnaturally large for even the largest stiffest nipples which had forced him into buying some training bras to hide and protect them from chaffing.

Even though the bras he bought were the plainest training bras with a cup size that was near non existent, wearing those and women's pants weren't really helping his self image. Neither of them compared to the absolute worst part of his new wardrobe though. His heels. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't put his foot down and trying was rather agonising. His tendons had shortened to the point that he just wasn't comfortable in anything but less than a three inch heel and since walking on his tippy toes would draw even more attention, he was forced to buy heels. He opted for sneaker styled wedged heels both for comfort and to look as inconspicuous as possible, but heels that tall clearly stood out as heels regardless. If they were only one inch tall he might have been able to find something that had a subtle enough elevation in the sole to pass of as normal thick soled sneakers, but with heels like these that was impossible. Regardless he would have had to deal with the knowledge that he was wearing heels. In an effort to hide them as much as possible he had bought his baggy pants with long pipes to come down nearly to the ground and thus hide his shoes as much as possible, it helped a little, but wasn't really a fix.

A last insult to injury had came from his underwear, the boxershorts he wore were pretty loose around the crotch as he had nowhere near enough cock to fill them even the slightest, and these women's pants pulled it even flatter. To top it all off these clothes felt awful compared to the luxurious sensual fabrics of his sissy outfits. Thinking back to how his fine nylons, or his satin panties felt on his smooth soft sensitive skin, Jason couldn't help but feel a little excited. Yet there was no way he would ever wear those things again no matter how good they had felt he just couldn't give in to something that mortifying not when trying to reclaim his masculinity, not that it made the craving for them any easier to handle.

While it didn't really count as clothes, there was one other thing Jason ended up having to wear all the time which was absolutely devastating for his attempt at reclaiming his masculinity, a butt plug. His ass was so stretched from the frequent fucks, and constant used of plugs that he had had some small, but mortifying accidents when trying to leave it empty. Making him realise that he would either have to wear a plug, or pick up the rigorous enema habits while wearing a pad to catch any water which might leak out later. A plug for as devastating as it was to be constantly filled had seemed like the better option to him, as enemas felt way too much like he was trying to get his ass ready to get fucked. At least that was he told himself, but a bigger reason was probably the fact that enema's made him cramp up which he had never gotten used to while something filling his ass actually felt rather good to him. He would never admit it, but that didn't stop himself from being utterly mortified whenever a soft moan escaped his lips when shoving the plug in or taking it out.

Fully dressed in clothes which did fit Jason was still mortified by how he looked. His arms looked entirely to slender and delicate for his liking and he was desperate to bulk up again, maybe gaining muscle would also fix the issue he had with his figure he hoped, but after months of constant muscle relaxants he could barely do a single girly push up, let alone a real one. He had great endurance, but that was about the extent of his fitness, his strength had pretty much vanished completely. He only really had the strength left to get by, but even when it came to opening a new bottle he had to ask his mom or sister for help which was devastating. At least they had a home gym so he didn't have to go out in public to work out where everyone could see him, or how weak he was. No matter how hard he worked out though, the best result he got was some soreness, but he never actually seemed to grow any muscle from it, the drug he had been fed, having destroyed his ability to gain strength. As it stood now a regular girl who was quite a bit smaller than he was could probably beat him up with ease if she tried.

One thing he had been forced to leave the house for in an attempt to get back to a more masculine look, was a haircut. It had taken a ton of effort to work up the courage, but he had gone to a barbershop specifically, a place which only catered to men, a small one with just one barber who didn't have that many clients so he would be alone and limit his exposure to other people as much as possible, and of course to go somewhere where he would get a definite male cut. It had by far been the biggest disaster of all. No matter what he had tried he had never managed to meet the older barber's eyes who was quite shocked and surprised to see such a long haired ginger walk into his shop as Jason's hairdo looked more suited to a beauty salon than it did a barbershop. His request for a male haircut, a short on the sides with some length up top to style it in a quiff had sounded right down his alley though. Colouring the copper coloured ginger into a dirty blonde was something he could do as well. Usually he only had to colour for his older male clients who wanted to cover up grey hairs, not all that often as a lot of the men just let it get grey, but he did have the tools so he could definitely do it.

Unable to meet the man's eye Jason had kept on looking down and each and every time the man walked in front of him, his eyes had automatically drifted towards the man's crotch despite his shame. He had just been staring without really realising it and when he did realise it he had instantly looked away, his face turning beet red. It had only gotten worse as the cut and colour ended up taking quite a bit of time leaving him staring at the man's crotch quite a bit, all kinds of mortifying thoughts filling his head, especially when the barber eventually popped a tent. Jason wished he could unsee that, wished that he hadn't gotten turned on by that, but his butt involuntarily clenched around the base of his plug in response making his excitement undeniable. If he could have, he would have ran away in shame, but he couldn't really run out in the middle of a much needed haircut without paying, he was stuck here for the duration and it was by choice, well choice and necessity as he couldn't wait to be rid of his long ginger tresses which even up in a messy bun had been nothing but mortifying.

The whole haircut had ended up coming with a mortifying conclusion when the barber had told him he could pay in the back, a small private room with a desk where the barber probably took care of his administration. Jason hadn't thought much of, at least not until the barber turned around catching Jason staring at his cock again as he swiftly unbuckled his pants and pulled out a six inch long cock sticking out of an unkept salt and pepper coloured bush of pubic hair. "Why don't you get on your knees and give it a good suckle and I'll consider your haircut paid for? There's no need to be shy about it now, I've seen you staring at the entire time, you obviously want this as much as I do." The man had said leaving Jason shocked and scrambling for words on how to turn this down.

After months of sucking more cocks than he could count or remember, never allowed to utter as much as no, Jason didn't even have what it took to point out how wildly inappropriate this was or straight up and strongly refuse. Instead he stammered a bit, his face turning beet, especially when his ass clenched around the plug once more, this was the first real cock he had seen since getting away from Sally, his own obviously no longer counting as a real cock and it was shamefully turning him on. Rather than a firm and steadfast no Jason scrambled an awkward apology only to tell the man that he would rather pay with money. At least that had been the plan after a few moments of just staring at that cock, but he never got past the sorry when the man put his hand on his shoulder and gently guided him down to his knees. "There's no need to be sorry, if anything I'm flattered that such a young pretty girl is interested in a guy like me, now just relax and enjoy. It truly is all yours." The man replied as Jason was unable to muster up the strength or courage to push back, letting himself get pushed down on his knees without resistance at all.

This barber was eager, pushy, but unlike Sally not at all malicious. It would have been as easy for Jason to stop this as a few firm words, or just a refusal to get down on his knees, but he hadn't had what it took to do either of those things, not even to correct this man who seemed to think he was a girl much to Jason's shame. This wasn't right, he was here to try and retain a part of his masculinity. He shouldn't be down on his knees face to face with a guy's rock hard cock, yet here he was, and for as mortifying as it was, a soft moan escaped his lips. After months of intense conditioning the smell and up close view just drove him crazy, he couldn't help it. Just like he couldn't manage to stand up for himself, or even politely decline. Instead he just leaned forward and wrapped his plump lips around the cock, feeling as though getting this over with was far easier than putting his foot down. It was just one more cock after all, nothing he hadn't done what felt like a million times before.