Rugby Daddy

Stu brought the car to a gentle stop in the car park and clambered out. He stood with his backpack close by to where the hiking trail began.

He was back here again after months. The last time he'd been here was with Joao and he'd had that secret surprise encounter with Nick in the woods. In the heat of summer with the oppressive sun and the high antics of an exciting sex life. It had been a fever dream, daring, full of colour and opportunity.

But the summer had turned to autumn, and now although still idyllic outside, the leaves had browned and the intense heat had become a temperate mildness.

Everything had changed in those few months. He'd had a romping secret affair with Nick, behind Eric's back. They'd grown close to one another, shared many moments of passion, of intellectual conversation, of joy and laughter.

But the rollercoaster had to drop back down to the earth at some stage. And their romance had imploded, coming to an abrupt stop.

They weren't the same people anymore - not Stu, nor Nick, nor even Eric. How could Stu or Eric look at each other as best-friends after what Stu had done? How could Nick or Eric look at each other the same way? Even Stu and Nick, they couldn't look at each other at all, the pain hurt too much.

The world had seemed to tilt slightly on its axis, everything slightly out of place, and there was no way of fixing it. Stu had seen to that with his behaviour. Messing it all up for everyone. He couldn't rewind time and put it all back to how it had been. Pandora's box had been opened, and it wouldn't close.

Stu looked up as he saw a familiar car pull up and park. He inhaled, taking in a deep breath. There was no point worrying about the past. What was done was done, as awful as he felt, he couldn't wrack his mind forever.

The car door opened.

'Hey, Eric,' Stu said.

'Hey,' Eric replied, pulling on a light jacket and rucksack. 'Ready to go?'

'Sure,' Stu nodded. Eric was down to business, he noted. They both set off on the trail for a hike.

The rhythmic crunch of the path beneath their boots filled to air amid the chirp of birds and low sound of waves further away.

'It's good to see you,' Stu said, breaking to silence. It had been weeks since he had seen him. The last time being the shouting match at Eric and Nick's house when Eric had found him with his Dad. He had been surprised that Eric had finally caved and agreed to see him. He guessed that countless unanswered calls and messages would do that to a person.

Eric smiled weakly but kept his gaze on the path ahead.

'Um, are you back home?' Stu pressed again, wanting to keep the conversation going after weeks of radio silence.

'Yeah, I'm back home now. I think Joao was getting sick of me cramping his style. I can't blame him, he likes his own personal space. But he did enough to let me stay in his place for that long.'

'And how are things with you and your ... Dad?' Stu was careful saying the word 'Dad', speaking it almost like a whisper, as if the word were taboo, like uttering it would cause an uncertain chaos.

Eric stiffened slightly, but took in a deep breath and carried on, relaxing before he responded. 'It's ok, we don't talk much. I have my space, he has his.'

Stu looked to his best-friend. His answer had been prompt, short, and efficient. He supposed it was more than he deserved, so didn't want to prod him more. He noticed there were bags under Eric's eyes. It was like he had aged years in the few weeks since he'd seen him.

The two men passed a group of hikers coming in the opposite direction. They nodded and stood to the side to allow them to pass.

'Look, Eric, I know it won't make up for anything but I really am sorry for everything, I know how fucked up it all was-' Stu verbally spewed, unable to hold himself back any further, but Eric cut him off.

'I know you are Stu. I know ...' Eric took a few beats before continuing. It was fucked up.'

'I haven't seen him or talked to him since that day, I promise!' Stu rambled again.

'Just let me finish,' Eric held up a hand.

Stu inhaled, but just nodded, biting his tongue before he let out another wave of nonsensical gibberish.

'I mean, I was really hurt by what happened. It's a crazy thing to even imagine, let alone see in real life, your best-friend and your Dad. I was so angry after it, and felt betrayed. You were my friend, my best-friend, it felt like you were stabbing me in the back, like you were stealing my Dad. But I know it wasn't just you, it was him too. Like he was stealing my friend. I know that's not what you were intending, it's just how I felt at the time.'

Stu looked down at the rocky path as they walked on, going around a curve in the trail. The feelings that weighed on his shoulders were heavy, and shameful.

'The thing that really gets me is that, over the past few months, Dad has been different ...' At that, Eric looked up, to the trees and birds, to the clouds and sky beyond. His eyes searched for something far away in wonder.

'He's been lighter, happier, easier to be around,' Eric continued. 'It's the first time since he separated from my other Dad that the smile has returned to his face. I mean, like he's been with other guys, you know, I'm not stupid, but none of them have had any effect on him like this. And the reason he's had this joyfulness to him is because ... of you.' At that, he turned to Stu, for the first time in weeks looking him dead in the eyes.

Stu returned Eric's look, his jaw agape. 'Me...?' was all he could utter. Thoughts swirled through his mind. Sure he knew of his own feelings for Nick, had really been aware of them when their budding romance had had to come to a hurtling stop and the pain in his chest had been so visceral, he thought he might die. But Nick ... he felt the same feelings in return?

Hearing about the positive effects he had had on Nick when they had been together struck him dumb, he was unable to process that reality.

'Of course. I know my Dad inside out, he's had a glow to him. It's all because of you. I guess that's why I like hanging around with you too, you're easy to be around. You have that effect on people.'

Stu just gulped and nodded, still reeling over Eric's admission.

'What made it even more obvious is how mopey he's been since you called things off with him. If you think I look bad, you should see him. Needs a good shave, shower and a personal trainer,' Eric jibed lightly.

Stu forced a chuckle, happy that his best-friend was in the mood for humour, but secretly it gave him no pleasure to hear that Nick was down in the dumps from the breakup.

'I'm sorry your Dad isn't doing great,' Stu said. 'Again, it's totally my fault. I take responsibility for what's gone down.'

Eric waved a hand, as if dismissing Stu's apology.

'Umm, can I ask ... why are you telling me all this?' Stu said gently. 'Not that I don't appreciate all your honesty, it just seems like this is leading to something?'

'You're right,' Eric said, and the two men came to a clearing that opened out in front of them. They came to stand close to the coast, the wide expanse of the sea in front of them.

'The past few weeks have been tough, and mentally draining, and all the worst things you can think of. But, seeing my Dad that happy again, after a really long time of bitterness and being stuck in his turmoil of a marriage with my other Dad ... it just was nice to see. Of course, it hurts that you were the secret lover,' Eric paused as Stu flinched, but continued.

'It took some very long days of thinking and chatting with Joao and struggling, and going back and forth. It took me a long time to arrive at the headspace I'm in now, but I just came to the conclusion that the world is bigger than just you and me and my Dad. There's so much I don't know or understand, and I don't understand this. It still makes me mad at times and it's tough to process, but I guess what I'm saying is ... I don't want to stand in the way of my Dad's happiness.' Eric's long explanation came to a close as he looked out to see. A breeze blew in, tussling his hair and he squinted against the wind.

Stu took it all in, the disjointed explanation, the words Eric had spoken, piecing it all together. 'I don't understand, what are you saying?'

'I'm saying ... I think I need to see the world, travel a bit, learn more about what's out there, about myself, see other cultures, and visit places. I'm going to go backpacking around the world, and I guess ... if you want to make my Dad happy ... it's ok, I give you permission,' Eric looked back to Stu.

It was a surreal moment. Stu couldn't believe his ears. Eric was allowing for this to happen between him and Nick. But also, he was leaving? 'You don't need to run away, Eric. This is your home, I'm not going to chase you away just because you think your Dad and I will be happy together with you not around. That's not how it works. We care too much about you, and we would miss you. You're more important than us being together.'

But Eric just shook his head and waved a hand. 'It's really ok. I've thought about it long and hard. Even if you don't get back together, I need to do this for myself. I want to see the world for myself.'

Stu had tears in his eyes. 'As long as you're doing it for yourself and not us. I don't even know if we will get back together ... Well, either way, I'll miss you.'

'Don't you get me started,' Eric wiped his eyes and the two best-friends hugged.

'It sounds like an amazing adventure.'

'I can't wait to see it all.'

Eric and Stu looked out to sea, their eyes on the horizon, looking towards the future, the great unknown of what was to come.

*****

'Passport? Ticket?' Nick asked.

'Yes, and yes, Dad for the one hundredth time,' Eric laughed at his Dad's fussing. He was carrying a rucksack amid the hustle and bustle of the busy airport.

'Let us know as soon as you land,' Victor, Eric's other dad said, making sure his son's bag was all zipped up and closed.

Stu looked on from a short distance away. People filed past as they hurried to check in their bags or go through security. It was rare for him to see both of Eric's dads together again, but they were still a family after all, and they both loved their son dearly.

'You ok?' Joao looped his arm into Stu's as he stood next to him, and shook him lightly.

Stu came out of his daydream. 'Yeah, fine,' he smiled. 'Just gonna miss him.'

'Same, girl, same,' Joao laid his head on Stu's shoulder.

They both watched as both of Eric's dads hugged their son and said their final goodbyes, teary-eyed.

Stu bit his lip, they were going to set him off next with all the emotions.

'Alright, I think I'm ready,' Eric said finally, looking towards the security gates.

Stu and Joao jumped to attention. It was time. They moved forward awkwardly, feeling as though they were imposing on a family moment.

'You weren't leaving without saying goodbye to us, girl, were you?' Joao threw his hands up and gave Eric a big hug.

'Of course not,' Eric laughed. 'I'll miss you, Joao.'

'Couldn't stand you anyway, bitch,' Joao feigned pushing Eric away and they both laughed. Even Nick and Victor joined in on the humour.

Then Eric turned finally to Stu - two best-friends looking to one another, so much to say, yet what could one say in a moment like that?

'I don't know what I'm going to do without you,' Stu said, hugging Eric.

'Me neither,' Eric squeezed back. 'We'll be ok. We'll talk everyday, promise!' Eric smiled.

Stu knew there were unspoken words between them about Stu and Nick, but they both knew it was better to leave them unsaid. It was Eric's moment after all. It was the start of his big adventure, so no need to sully it with the messiness that was Stu and Nick.

So they left it at a simple knowing nod.

'Bye,' Eric smiled.

'I'll see you soon,' Stu replied, letting go of his best-friend.

With that Eric took one last look at his entourage, gave a wave goodbye and turned, heading towards the security gates.

And he was gone.

Stu turned away, tears streaming down his face. Apart from Eric's recent MIA status while at Joao's, Stu hadn't been away from his best-friend for more than a few days since they were babies. Now he wouldn't see him for a year. And he couldn't but muster up a few words in farewell. He should've said he was sorry, and he needed him, and he would miss him. But it was too late now.

Joao threw an arm around Stu as they walked through the airport to the carpark, milling in and out of wades of people.

'He's just a video call or message away,' Joao cooed, rubbing Stu's back.

'I know,' Stu said in a little voice, unable to keep the emotion from his speech.

Stu sniffled as Joao led him away, until a voice came from behind him.

'Wait, Stu!'

The pair turned around, expecting Eric to come running after them.

But standing there was Nick, with Victor a few paces behind.

Stu rubbed his cheeks with the back of his hand. He hadn't seen nor spoke to Nick in weeks since he'd walked out on him at the house. So, seeing him now face-to-face after all this time, his feelings still hurt after the breakup, plus the overwhelming emotions of having just bid farewell to his best-friend, it was all quite a lot at once to deal with.

'I don't think now is the time,' Stu said, his voice a tremor; he could barely look at Nick. He was still as handsome as always. It just tore an emotional wound inside Stu.

'It's nothing bad, I just wanted a quick chat, I promise,' Nick said.

'Look, he's clearly not in the mood, right now,' Joao began to pull Stu away.

But before Stu could stop himself he heard himself say: 'No, it's ok, we can chat.' Maybe I need to just air out my feelings instead of ignoring them, he thought to himself. Even if I do look a state.

'Are you sure?' Joao asked.

Yeah, I'll be ok,' Stu nodded.

'Ok, well I'll be over in the lost and found. Maybe I can claim one of the lost luggage bags. Wanna come, Victor?' Joao jerked his head.

'Joao, you know that's not how that works,' Victor followed the young man.

'Hey, finders keepers and all that,' Joao skipped over to the desk and Victor chuckled as he accompanied him.

Stu and Nick stood over to the side away from the noise of the crowds.

'You ok?' Nick placed a hand gently on Stu's shoulder. 'You know he's not gone forever, he'll be back.'

Stu stiffened at Nick's touch, but didn't move away. He was tired of having to shirk away his feelings, so he allowed the moment of compassion from the man he had loved.

'I know,' Stu sniffed. 'Don't mind me. Anyway, what did you want to talk to me about?'

'Well, I know things with us were messy, and it ended badly. I'm not going to lie, I have missed you, really badly. But I understand that you were putting Eric before us, which is admirable. I respect your decision, I won't encroach on you, as much as it pains me.'

Stu listened to Nick's babbling, as much as it hurt.

'But I just wanted to say that I'm always here for you if you need to talk, or if you need help with anything. Not like before obviously, but just as friends. I'd like us to start over, if we can.'

Stu repeated the words in his head: 'just as friends.' They weren't words he'd necessarily apply to the two of them. After all they'd been through, the moments they'd shared, the feelings they'd professed for one another, what they'd done in bed and the sweet things they'd said to one another. 'Just friends' was a punch to the gut, like it was wiping away their history like a clean slate. In his heart of hearts, he knew he wanted more, but he couldn't say it aloud.

Unable to talk, he just broke down in tears.

Seeing this, Nick pulled him into a tight embrace, his large frame holding him steady.

Stu held on dearly, feeling the embrace he had missed for the past few weeks. He let out all the emotions he had been keeping in, about Nick, about Eric, about it all.

Nick held him, repeating over and over that would all be ok.

In the end, things would work out.

We just had to believe they would.

*****

ONE YEAR LATER

'Come on, we're going to be late, Eric's plane already landed,' Stu hopped out of the car.

'Aright, hold your horses, girl,' Joao said, jumping out of the car too and following Stu through the car park.

They raced out and made their way through the winding corridors and walkways of the arrivals terminal.

'What about Nick, is he there?' Joao shouted to Stu as they weaved in and out of people.

'He and Victor are there at the arrivals gate already,' Stu yelled back.

People around them turned to watch their loud commotions as they whizzed by.

The pair rushed as fast as they could, not wanting to miss Eric as he walked through the gates to the terminal.

They turned a corner and were relieved to see the arrivals gate in sight. Coming to a slow jog, they looked around and spotted Nick and Victor standing by some benches.

Phew, Stu thought. Eric hadn't arrived yet.

The pair strolled over to Nick and Victor, greeting them.

'I thought we were going to miss them,' Stu said breathlessly, his hands on his hips as he regained his breath.

Nick grinned a knowing look, raising an eyebrow and jerking his chin behind Stu and Joao.

The pair turned on there standing with a lumbering rucksack on his back with a big smile on his face was Eric.

'Oh my God,' both Stu and Joao yelled and they embraced Eric in a tight hug.

'You're here!' Stu yelped.

'What the fuck, girl,' Joao squeezed Eric.

'Nice to see you guys too,' Eric laughed as they let go of him eventually.

'We've already said all our hellos. You guys were so late, Eric even managed to get in a toilet break. So we decided to play a little prank on you,' Nick laughed, hugging his son.

'That's so mean,' Stu punched Eric.

'I wanted to come back on a bang,' Eric chuckled.

'And your hair, girl, it's ... a look,' Joao nodded to how Eric's short buzzcut was now shoulder-length.

'Uhh, I've missed your little jibes,' Eric prodded Joao.

'Plus I want you to meet someone,' he gestured towards a young woman who had been floating nearby. 'This is Isabella, we met while travelling, she's from Rome originally. We're dating now.'

'Hi, nice to meet you,' Isabella spoke.

'Lovely to meet you,' Stu gave her a hug.

'Great to meet you, and I love your accent. You have to tell me all about Italian fashion,' Joao was typically fawning over Isabella, who laughed and clicked with Joao almost immediately.

'Shall we go? I think we're blocking all the arrivals, folks,' Victor smiled as he led the group through the airport.

As they walked and chatted with one another, Stu fell in beside Nick. He turned to him and gave him a smile.

Nick returned the expression and reached down to hold his hand.

The pair walked hand-in-hand behind the others.

Eric turned to look back at Nick and Stu, catching a glance of their closeness and their hands grasped in connection.

Stu inhaled a breath, holding it. The moment seemed to go in slow motion, pausing for what felt like eternity. He didn't know how Eric would respond. A blush crept onto Stu's face.

But Eric just smiled in response, happy to see them together.

And the world kept on turning, life resuming to normality as the moment passed.

Stu let go of the breath he was holding, relief descending upon him.

That had been the first hurdle, but Eric seemed all ok with their renewed relationship.

He felt Nick squeeze his hand, and he squeezed back.

They walked on, all of them together, towards what the future held.

*****

EPILOGUE

Nick held Stu in his lap, cupping his butt cheeks as he bounced him up and down on his dick. He laid on his bed, with his back against the pillows for support.

'Uhhhh, uhhh, uhhh, fuck that feels good,' Stu moaned as he rode the shaft. It rammed up inside him, pressing firmly on his prostate every time he lowered himself from his crouch down into Nick's lap.