The A.V. Club

A Novel by J.K. Ermon (jokermon)

Chapter Eight: Special Education

This is a work of erotic fantasy fiction for the entertainment of adults only. Everything in this story is imaginary and is not meant to represent any real-life people, events, or medical conditions. It contains explicit futanari (hermaphrodite) content. If that's not your thing, or if reading this type of material is unlawful where you reside, don't read it. All characters in sexual situations are 18 years of age or older, even if it seems otherwise for dramatic or narrative purposes. Please enjoy this story responsibly and do not repost without permission. This story is copyright©2016 J.K. Ermon.

~~~

When I woke up Monday morning, my dick washuge.

It was the first thing I noticed. The tent pitched by my morning boner was way taller than normal. Itloomed.

"Jesus," I croaked. I could feel it, that was the thing. I knew it was all me under that sheet. It was no trick of the light or illusion of perspective. When I felt a pulse go through my dick, the sheet shuddered.

I lifted up the sheet and took a peek.

"Jesus," I whispered. "Jesus H. Christ."

I was as big as Hallie from my favorite photospread. Atleastthat big. It had pushed through the flap of my pj's and flaunted itself with beefy arrogance.

I measured it with my hands. I gripped the base and then stacked my other fist on top of it. Then I released the base and stackedthatfist on top. I gulped.

My hands aren't small, and I was three whole fists long. Not including my knob. Both my knob and my shaft were, incidentally, quite a bit fatter. My hands have long fingers -- Mom calls thempiano-player's hands,and was heartbroken when I had no musical talent -- but they couldn't wrap as far around. I had to adjust my grip. That was a weird thing to figure out on a Monday morning.

I let it go and just stared at it. Not only was it bigger, my dick alsolookedbetter. It was smoother, more curved, the head pinker and shinier. My foreskin looked less gnarled.

Well, hello you handsome devil,I thought, bemused.

I checked my balls. They were bigger, too.

Jesus,I thought. This is gonna take some getting used to. Then, in a fleeting moment of ingratitude, I thought,Dammit, I donotneed my nuts to present an even bigger target at school.

I was tempted to take my new dick for a test drive, but Mom was already calling me down to breakfast. There was no time. I hollered back and hustled to the bathroom.

~~~

Mom put a plate of scrambled eggs in front of me and then stopped cold.

"Bobby," she said, "what happened to your face?"

"What do you mean?" I asked. I touched my brow, half expecting to find devil's horns.

"All your pimples are gone. When did that happen?"

Across the table, Dad's newspaper lowered a few inches. The crown of his bald head appeared and his bushy eyebrows furrowed as he peered at me.

"All of them?" I asked.

My mother grabbed my chin and turned my face this way and that. I made an "urmph"sound in protest.

"All gone," she pronounced, releasing me. "Every last one. And your skin looks beautiful."

My kid sister Alison sniggered next to me. "Bobby'sbeautiful."

I kicked her under the table, but not too hard. She was only occasionally insufferable. Technically we were twins, but didn't look any more alike than normal siblings. I call her my kid sister (which she hates) because Iamolder, by about forty minutes. In terms of maturity, I am years beyond her.

Dad made aharrumphingsort of noise and the newspaper portcullised back up.

The phone rang. Alison dashed to pick it up. She made a face.

"Bobby, it's for you, it's one of your dork friends."

"Alison,"my mother reproved.

She shrugged and handed me the handset with supreme kid-sister disdain.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Bobby?" said Frank. "It's me."

Frank never identified himself on the phone. He always just saidit's me.It wasn't something he did consciously. To be fair, his voice was pretty distinctive, so it wasn't like you didn't know who it was. He had never called my house in the morning before.

"What is it, Frank?"

"Bobby," he said. "It's bigger."

His voice was a little abrupt. My ears pricked up. For Frank, this was a panicked phone call.

I made sure my voice sounded casual. My family was eavesdropping. I know they didn't mean to, but me getting phone calls over breakfast was an unusual occurrence.

"And by that, you mean...?"

"It,"he said, with special emphasis. "Is bigger."

"Ah," I said. "Uh..." I wracked my brain for a non-specific way to phrase my words. "By a little, or a lot?"

"A lot," he said immediately. He must have been really rattled. "Alot,Bobby."

"Okay," I said. "Well, same here."

"Really? You too?"

"Yeah. I think we can all expect to have...similar results." I cleared my throat. "I mean...it's not like there's no precedent for this kind of reaction. You must have expectedsomethingwould happen."

"But...with just one exposure?"

Through the earpiece, I could hear Frank's family having breakfast behind him. I was glad he was being discreet.

"Two," I corrected him. "Friday, remember? And the...exposures...were considerable."

Frank swallowed drily. He was really struggling. "Bobby...how much?"

I blanked for a second. Then I figured out what he was asking. "Oh yeah. Uh..." I renewed my efforts to sound casual. "About...double, I think. At least. Maybe two and a half. You?"

"Same," he said. The shock and relief in his voice were barely noticeable, which meant they were significant. "The same. Maybe...a little more. But about that, yes."

Jesus,I thought.How big did Frank's cock get?He was already the girthiest one of us.

"Well, there you go," I said. "We'll talk about it at school, okay?"

"Okay," he said.

For once I couldn't interpret Frank's natural impassivity. I paused.

Are you okay, brother?

That was what I wanted to ask him. I couldn't say that out loud with my family listening.

"So...how are you feeling about this...overall result?"

"I'm...a little unsettled. I know it sounds silly. I, of all of us, should have been ready for this. I just...I never thought something this...amazing would happen to me. To us. I think I was convinced, at the back of my mind, that the whole phenomenon would somehow just...skip us."

I gave a dry laugh. "Sounds about right for our luck. But Idothink things are changing, for the better."

I put as much reassurance into that as I could without tweaking my family's antennae.

"Okay," he said, and I could tell he was calmer. "Okay. I'll call the others. We'll meet before homeroom. Goodbye for now, Bobby."

"Bye, Frank."

I hung up.

"What was that about?" Dad asked from behind his newspaper.

"Just some lab work," I said with a shrug. "AP Physics stuff."

I was moving back to the table when the phone rang again.

"What now?" Mom asked.

I was already on my feet, so I went back and picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Bobby?Bobby!"It was Mark, blaring in my ear. I clamped my hand around the earpiece to muffle it. "It's Mark! I just woke up and my dick isfucking massive!"

~~~

"Well, I, for one, feel royally fucking ripped off," said Jack.

We were all in the AV storage room. It was about thirty minutes to homeroom. I had locked the door behind us. It was a good thing I did, because no sooner were all five of us in there than Mark and Frank shoved their pants and underwear down.

I gaped. We all did. Their penises had become pale salamis hanging down to mid-thigh. Mark's circumcised knob was fat, rosy-pink and plum-smooth. Their balls were huge, Frank's especially. When Frank pulled back his foreskin, his cock immediately began to enlarge. Like some kind of reflex response, Mark's did too. So did mine. I opened my pants and let it out.

"Holyshit,"choked Donnie. His eyes were ping-ponging between all three of our dicks. Jack's gaze was doing the same. To tell the truth, all of our eyes were doing the same. Our wangs looked almost dickgirl-sized. And this wasn't in a dim, lamplit basement; this was in a sober, well-lit schoolroom.

Mark's was about the same size as mine, but ramrod-straight while mine was curved. Frank's was curved as well, but his was a monster. It was thicker than Mark's or my own, and a good inch longer. His glans had become a blushing pink orb, and it bobbed in front of his navel.

Something about their expressions made my dick surge to even greater and more pleasurable fullness. Frank's and Mark's were doing the same. All three wangs were hopping in place and drooling.

"Royallyfucking ripped off," repeated Jack faintly.

They weren't just bigger, either. Like mine, they were sleeker and handsomer.

"I can't...believeit," said Donnie.

Jack reached out and grasped Frank's cock around the middle. He squeezed it. It pulsed and dropped a big glop of clear juice.

"Huh," Jack said. "Feels pretty damn real to me." He felt Frank's cock all over. "Wow. How's this for anecdotal evidence, Frank?"

"Compelling," he said tightly.

"But," said Donnie plaintively, "why not Jack and me?"

I said, "It'll happen. Give it time."

"It may be," said Frank, "that the process is dealing with other, more pressing issues with your health first. Jack has asthma."

"That's right," I said. "And he hardly used his inhaler yesterday."

Jack looked stunned. "I didn't need it. Today neither. Usually I need to, first thing."

Mark looked at Donnie. "What about you?"

Donnie looked thoughtful. "Astigmatism." He took his glasses off. For the first time I noticed he wasn't wearing his usual heavy square frames. "These are my dad's reading glasses. I wore them so I wouldn't draw attention to myself. When I woke up...I didn't need the old ones."

Frank cleared his throat. "Are you saying...your vision has cleared? Entirely?"

"Twenty-twenty."

Jack blurted out, "That'simpossible."

Mark pulled out a notepad and wrote on it. He took five steps away from Donnie and held it up.

Donnie glanced at it and calmly said, "Bullshit."

"Jesus,"Mark wheezed.

I squinted at the pad and could just barely make out the wordbullshitwritten in tiny letters.

Donnie took three pens out of his breast pocket-protector and started juggling them. We'd all seen him do that before, but never without his glasses. Next to Allen, he had the poorest vision but the best manual dexterity of all of us.

Jack let go of Frank's prick. His hands fell limp to his sides.

"That's...this is..." He gulped.

He put his inhaler on the table. Without warning, he started jogging on the spot.

"Hey, take it easy," said Mark, alarmed.

Jack pumped his arms and brought his knees up high on every stride. He jogged for a full minute, then two. His breathing remained steady. We all stared in stunned silence as he passed three minutes and then four. No puffing, no gasping.

After five minutes, he stopped. He was breathing deeply, but didn't seem tired or even winded. He hadn't even broken a sweat.

"I...wow," he said.

"How...how do you feel?" Donnie asked.

"Good," said Jack. He looked stunned, but also like he might cry. "I...my legs don't even hurt. They just feel...warm. My chest isn't tight at all." He let out a bark of laughter filled with unadulterated joy. "This isamazing!"

"Well," said Frank, looking down at his towering member. "NowIfeel royally fucking ripped off."

We all started, and stared at him.

Mark said, "Did you...just make ajoke?"

Frank blinked. "I don't think so. Honestly, I would rather have perfect vision than an enormous penis." He tapped his taped-up glasses.

"But..." Mark struggled. "But...you took what Jack said and flipped it around. That's...humor."

Frank shrugged. "If you say so."

I looked around. All of our faces were clear of acne. Jack's black eye was gone. We all looked...better. I suddenly noticed something else: Jack and Mark and Donnie were taller. It wasn't a big change, or would have spotted it sooner, but it was definitely there.

"Incredible," I said.And this is just the beginning,I thought.

Abruptly, Donnie asked, "Have you...tried them out yet?"

"You mean jacking off?" I asked.

He nodded.

I shook my head. "Didn't have time."

Frank and Mark shook their heads.

"You raise a good point," Frank said. "We should see how they perform."

"Let's do Frank first," said Jack with poorly-concealed eagerness. He licked his palm and seized Frank's monster again.

The rest of us exchanged glances, shrugged, spat in our palms, and joined him. Donnie and Jack whacked Frank's shaft while Mark played with his bulb and I cupped his balls.

He'd grown a great big pair of rolling goose eggs overnight. I handled and squeezed them with great care and curiosity.

"Hmm." Frank somehow managed to sound both thoughtful and breathless. "The sensitivity has improved. Definitely. Much more responsive. I'm getting...much more excited, in less time." He closed his eyes. "It feels...verygood."

Sap bubbled from his slit. Soon his entire length was shiny and slippery. Our hands squished as they worked on him.

"Jeez, Frank," Jack said quietly. "Your cock isincredible."

We all murmured in agreement. It was the truth. Frank's member throbbed and surged in our hands with inspiring power. Looking down at it, I found my mouth watering just like I had for Pauline's big cock. I looked around and the others were slavering too.

Frank's balls lifted up. I knew what that meant. I encircled his root with thumb and forefinger and cranked it.

"All right," he said suddenly. "This is it..."

His dick pulsed and flung a long lasso of sperm across the room. He grunted sharply. Several equally big spurts followed. Their high arc nearly touched the ceiling.

Donnie gasped. "Whoa!"

The sweet smell of it was immediately evident. It wasn't as seductive as Pauline's, but certainly rich and pleasant. It reminded me of the time I was helping Jack at the Admiral's snack bar, and opened a just-delivered box of Zero bars. I got a noseful of fresh-from-the-factory white chocolate, caramel and nutty nougat. Frank's cum smelled like that. It almost didn't smell like cum at all.

There was sperm all over our fingers. Frank collected some on his fingertips and brought it to his nose. We all did the same. We sniffed it, and then, starting with Jack, tasted it.

"Whoa," whispered Donnie.

Frank's cum tasted just as good as it smelled. Again, not as delicious as Pauline's, and no kick of vitamin J, but still quite tasty. It was a little salty, but overtop sweetness instead of blandness.

Jack uninhibitedly licked his fingers clean. After a pause, the rest of us did the same.

"Damn, Frank," I said in a hushed voice. "Your cum tastes...reallygood."

There were murmurs of agreement.

"Thank you, I suppose," he panted. "That orgasm, incidentally, was...stronger, and...more voluminous than normal."

Mark stared at the sperm dripping down the far wall. "Yeah, no shit."

I said, "I think we can expect that to be our new baseline."

"Possibly," said Frank. "But not without further trials. Who's next?"

I held up my fist and so did Mark. Three shakes later, I had Scissors and he had Rock. "Shit," I said.

Mark's cock filled my palm impressively. It was firm and fleshy. When I squeezed, it oozed out juice. Donnie and I jacked him off while Frank played with his balls and Jack rubbed the underside of his glans.

His prick was very responsive. We brought him to orgasm in half the time it took Frank. It was another white-chocolate gusher.

"Wow!" Mark gasped, watching his spume fly through the air. "Jeez,Frank, you weren't kidding."

Mark's cum was subtly different from Frank's in smell and taste. It was just as delicious. We all licked our fingers clean again. Jack went so far as to grasp that dick and squeeze out more cum into his cupped palm. He slurped it down.

When it was my turn, I lasted the shortest of us all. Barely twenty seconds of ball-rubbing, shaft-stroking and frenulum play later, I was shooting an all-new personal best.

"Ahwow,"I gasped.

My sperm was sweet, like the others, but also distinct. The others liked it just as much, but I thought I tasted a little harsher.

Jack said, "I think we can safely say you were right about the baseline, Bobby."

"That's not scientific," said Frank reprovingly.

I was suddenly aware of the foot traffic in the hallway outside. The AV room was on the main floor across from the library. It was ten minutes to homeroom on a Monday. Out in the hall, somebody dropped a textbook and cursed.

"Hmm," Frank said. "Perhaps...this isn't the ideal location for a circle jerk?"

Mark started. "Are you being...funny?"

Frank shrugged. "If I am, it's not intentional."

For some reason the others looked at me. Then I got it; ordinarily I would be the first one to advise caution, not Frank. I should've been trying to kill this test flight before it started.

I cleared my throat. "Motion to suspend all group experimentation until the meeting this Sunday?"

"Seconded," said Donnie.

"Any opposed?" asked Jack.

Frank and Mark shook their heads.

"Motion passed," said Jack. "Now somebody clean up all this jizz before homeroom."

~~~

The AV Club's little pre-class meeting had me distracted. It was second period before I remembered Emily.

During third period study hall, I went the school administration office next to the principal's lair. I needed to check on something.

There was nothing unusual about me being in the office. I was often in there, filing and performing other tiresome chores.

Grant Memorial's admin staff used the smarter students as unpaid menial labor. It was one of the many burdens of being a nerd. You were socially ostracized, but that didn't stop the powers-that-be from utilizing you productively. You didn't get to be on the prom committee, but you still had to collate PTA mail-outs. Any officey crap the staff didn't want to do was unfailingly delegated to students of a certain IQ range. They trusted us because we were too chickenshit to be untrustworthy.

Nobody even glanced my way as I rifled through the Special Ed student files. Two minutes later I was looking at an unsmiling black-and-white student ID photo of my new friend. It sat paper-clipped to a sheaf of academic records. There was a cover sheet with the intimidating message TO BE READ BY ADMIN STAFF ONLY in official-looking block type.

I'm not a snoop by nature. My gut told me Emily was good people, but I wanted to be sure. Back then, Special Education was a catch-all dumping ground for not just mentally handicapped kids, but also kids with serious psychological problems. One such kid, a firebug, burned down an entire wing of Grant High in my freshman year. He was the reason we had so many portables. If Freckles was a juvenile offender majoring in extortion or theft, I needed to know that.

I flipped through her information. It was all reassuringly banal. Her full name was Emily Agnes Rosemary McPherson. They had her taking a bunch of Mickey Mouse vocational courses. They seemed to think she would be best served learning how to cook and clean and sew.

I checked out a couple evals.Very well behaved,one read in Mrs. Nessman's ornate and impeccable hand.Occasionally impatient with the level and pace of her coursework.

The A.V. Club - Ch.08

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