The Devotee

(Another long one.)

*

Ida Plank to Edith Fawcett

Monday 14 August 1905

Dear Miss Fawcett

I am sorry for bothering you but something has happened what concerns you and Mister Squire. Please dont show this letter to no one else.

Me and another girl who works here Kate Morley have noticed that the Freeholds are always bickering about how they have no money.

I told you when i was down at the house in Kent that Mister Squire gave me a book which i liked very much. He wrote in it to me. Mrs Freehold found it and took it off me saying it was not meant for me but i should of given it to her. I knew that this was not true but i could do nothing. I thought she wanted it for herself but i later found out it got sold to a bookshop.

Now Miss Fawcett i have to say something about things that happened with you and me.

I know i said some horrible things to you but my feelings were very hurt by what you told me and i spoke in anger. I was most upset and i still am but not so upset that i do not care what happens to you and yours. There are things i think and feel which i cannot put down on paper.

I think you should watch the Freeholds very carefully.

If you think of writing to me please do not. Not because i do not want to know what you think of what i have said but because i think i am going to lose my job soon, so i would not get any letter you sent here.

I do not suppose you feel friendly towards me and that is just how it is. It is sad.

But for Mister Squires sake i suggest you be careful.

I hope you have been well.

Your humble and obedient servant

Ida Plank

*

From the diary of Edith Fawcett

Wednesday 16 August 1905

Extraordinary letter from Ida.

Very frosty and wounded. She had obviously taken enormous pains to get the spelling right.

She told a rather extraordinary tale about Mrs Freehold taking the Tennyson from her. She says in passing that the Freeholds are always arguing about money and that we should 'watch' them. I really do not know what to make of this.

I must bring this up with Mr Squire, but not in a direct way. I gather from his remarks that he knows that Mrs F does not like me. If I repeat Ida's claim that Mrs F took the book from her, which is in any case hard to believe, it will look like I have some personal grudge.

In the meantime, I found the book in his library, and opened it at the title page. There was the inscription, from the poet to the very young Mr Squire. The rest of the page was blank.

As I turned it about in my hands, the light from the window caught the page, and I saw the faint imprint of pencil tracks.

By tilting the book, they became more visible. Someone had written another message, in pencil, which had later been erased, but the track of the pencil mark was still visible, although the inscription itself was no longer legible.

I wondered why a pencil had been used. Mr Squire never writes in pencil. He always uses the most up to date Waterman fountain pens.

I had lunch with him. As we ate our omelettes (I have stopped drinking wine at lunch, as it makes me sleepy and sensual), I found my moment.

'Sir, may I ask a rather unusual question?'

'Asking can't hurt,' he said.

'When you gaveIdylls of the Kingto Miss Plank, did you inscribe it to her?'

'Yes. I hadn't been going to, but she specifically asked me to. She said that if I didn't, nobody would believe I had given it to her.'

'What did you use to sign the book? I have never known you to use anything except a pen.'

'Oh, I was in the kitchen, and my pen was in the study. I used Mrs Hill's pencil.'

'I see.'

'Why do you ask?'

'Because the inscription has been erased,' I said. 'Almost as if nobody wanted to know that you had given it to her.'

'Yes, I saw that. That is what I thought too.'

'Then why would she ask you to inscribe it in the first place?'

'I don't know,' he said. He sipped at his Moselle appreciatively and took another forkful of omelette.

'Perhaps she accepted the book in good faith, but disliked it, and later found out that it was valuable.'

'Possibly,' I said, 'but I suspect that semi-literate housemaids do not have a great deal of time to pore through the pages of rare book catalogues.'

Mr Squire swallowed, and looked at me.

'Ah,' he said.

'And if she wanted to conceal who it was given to,' I added, 'why did she give her own name as the seller?'

He looked thoughtful.

'I would not want to claim that I know Miss Plank's inmost heart,' I said, 'but I cannot make any sense of her wanting you to sign it, and then erasing your words and selling it on, but then giving her own name when she did so. It is bizarre.'

'That it is,' he said. He sat back and opened his eyes wide.

'Perhaps we have misjudged Miss Plank,' he said. 'Do you think she sold it?'

'In all honesty, sir, I don't know if I have ever really thought she sold it.'

'I shall bring it up with Mary in my next letter.'

'Actually, sir, could you oblige me enormously by not doing so?'

'Why not?'

'It is a matter that requires great discretion,' I said. 'If Miss Plank is the honest and sensible working girl I take her to be, she might not have realised how valuable the book is, but in any case, she would have kept the book safe, not left it lying around. And if she really had been so careless as to leave it out, where it might have been stolen by a visitor to the house, or a visitor's servant--frankly, out of remorse over how I treated her, I would rather keep that from Mrs Freehold.'

'Yes,' he said thoughtfully. 'If Miss Plank did sell it, that would make me sad--but it was, after all, hers to sell. But if she is the victim of theft... yes, Mary is a little too ready to hand out harsh judgements about other people's carelessness.'

He pushed his plate away from him and dabbed his lips.

'You are right,' he said. 'I shall not mention it.'

'Thank you very much, sir.'

He rose to his feet.

'Go forth, Miss Holmes,' he said with a theatrical gesture, 'and get to the bottom of this, if you can, without ruffling the considerable feathers on the most prominent bird.'

'I will do my best, sir,' I said, smiling.

Later:

Mr Scope was due to spend his last night here, but he has been detained in London, so he will be back tomorrow and shall leave on Monday.

I confess that, although I would not wish to have not had my liaison with him, I am not sorry to see it end.

I learned much about myself and my body, not least that it is not so easy as I thought to tell where my self ends, and my body begins.

I learned that heterosexual sodomy, if practised between two intelligent and reasonably sympathetic adults, can be satisfying for both parties,ifthe receiving partner is properly prepared, and is in the appropriate mood.

That said, my appetite for it is quite sated.

It shall be some time, I think, before I once again consent to have anyone insert any part of their body into my anus.

*

From the diary of Ida Plank:

Friday 18 August 1905

Well well my old diary, things ave been appenin around ere and that aint a lie.

I wos cleanin Mr and Mrs Fs bedroom when Kate tells me erself wants to see me. So i go down to her office.

Ah ida, she sez, Im afraid I have some rather bad news.

Yes maam, i sez.

Times are difficult she sez, we are all havin to econnomize an Im afraid that looking at the accownts, we must make some cuts in house hold expences.

And i knew what was comin.

Yes maam, i sez.

What this means for you, she sez, is that we cannot aford to ave two maids insted of one.

Yes maam.

However, she sez, and she smiles funny like, I am prezented with a problum. You have bin ere longer an you know our ways, wile kate is a good sort but she does not have your expeerients.

I sez nothin.

On the other hand, she sez, kate is as I have sed a good sort, but you have your little deefects of character have you not.

An she gives me this sort of littl smile. Like she knows all my secrits.

Maam, i sez.

I mean, she sez, your littul ways about you. Like taking the propperty of others as if it were your own.

I sez nothin.

He sez, I know you, shall we say, miss under stood, but it was a littl bit nawty of you was it not.

I sez nothin.

It is all water under the brij now she sez, an I am prepared to forgiv and forget. But I simply cannot chuse between you two.

She smiles at me like its all a big puzzl.

So she sez, I should like you to make the choice. Who should I let go, you or kate. I shall abide by your desizhun.

I look at er.

So thats the game, i thowt. Lose my job or sell kate down the river.

Kate is lovly but she is not on top of things like i am. Not that i am some geenius but i know this ouse and ow it works. She wud pick it up, shes smart, shes just always let me do all that stuff cos she knew i wud.

On top of witch it seems the story now is, not that i was sposed to giv er the book, but that I nickd it and got fownd out, and shes bein all nice abowt it.

I wos thinkin very ard.

But i think its cos i been usin my brain more lately. Readin an that. Cos then I knew what to say.

Maam, i sez, may i ask a qwestion.

You may ask, she sez, I shall decide wether I shall anser.

Will you give me a recomendashun, i sez.

Ah, she sez. Well, that is a littl bit delicket. After all you did steel from us. Im afraid we wud not be able to give you a recomendashun no.

I lookd at her for a minnit an i felt very carm.

Thats alright maam, i sez, i understand you ave to be onest. I am very grateful that you gave me this pozishun an im very sorry i ave let you down. You should get rid of me and keep kate.

She gave a start. I think she thowt i would sell kate out.

I see, she sez. That is your desizhun then.

Yes maam. She will shape up into a very good maid. I will find some other pozishun somewere i am sure.

No dowt, she sez. Well thank you ida for making that easy. I hereby give you your two weeks notiss.

Thank you maam, i sez, still lookin at her.

An then i know she xpects me to get up and go but i dont. I just sit there.

She looks back at me like shes puzzld wy i am still ere.

Maam, i sez, wud it be possibul for you to do somethin for me. It wont cost you nothin an it will take only a moment.

I dont see wy not, she sez, lookin releeved.

The book that Mister Squire gave me that i should ave give to you, i sez, watchin er. I know i made a mistaik there, but wile i ad it i found it ever so interestin, and i think it elped me with my reedin.

Yes, she sez startin to look worryd.

Wud it be possibul, i sez, for me to ave a last look at it.

We stair at each other. Long silents.

Last goodbye sort of thing, i sez.

She is starin at me an er jaw is sort of flappin a bit.

Um it is er I dont have it, it is in my room beside my bed, she sez. I am reading it.

No it aint, i sez. I know it aint cos i was cleanin your room just now, fore i came down.

Oh thats right, she sez, I uh I put it on a high shelf an I dred going up that ladder.

Thats all right, i sez, i dont mind the ladder, i cud get it down for you.

Oh you mean the uh, you mean the Tennyson, she sez. Idylls of the King. That book.

Thats the one yeah, i sez.

Im still lookin right at her.

Ah yes she sez, it is most uh it is most unforchunut but I ave miss placed it.

Miss placed it, i sez.

Yes, she sez. You know how it is you put a book down and then you cant find it again. It is no great loss for it was only a cheep edishun.

I thowt you said it was a trezhur, i sez.

Oh the poetry is a trezhur, the poetry, she sez, and she is sweatin like a joint of meat over the fire. The book it self is worth littl, she sez.

Ah i sez. So just a cheap copy then.

Xactly she sez.

Wud you like me to write to Miss Fawcett an tell er wot as append, i sez. That you took reseet of the book an then you miss placed it. I dont mind doin it an I should like to practiss my writin, and since it is only a cheap edishun i am sure Mister Squire will get you an other one.

No no no, I shall take care of that, she sez. It is my business.

Ah, i sez. Your right of corse.

Yes I shall write to Mister Squire she sez. I am your employer. It would be wrong for you to write such a letter as long as you are in my pay. But have no fear, I shall explain everything.

Good, i sez, that makes me feel much better.

Yes, well that shall be all ida, she sez.

Yes maam, i sez. And when i am no longer ere, I sez, do not worry. I shall write to Miss Fawcett, to send my best wishes to Mister Squire, and apollogize to him for not passin it on. Because I know e wud be very sorry to think I didnt give you the gift that you trezhur so much.

She stares at me.

She knows I know she sold it.

She knows that once I dont work ere any more I can write to ooever I bloody want.

I smile like Im sorry I did wrong an I just want to make it better.

She puts her ands on the table.

Ida, she sez, are you sure you wud not like to stay heah.

No maam, I sez, like Im sorry I let er down. Its better if I go. Kate will do you nicely after I am gone.

Really, she sez.

Really, I sez. Its most kind but no.

I see I see, she sez. Well I ave ad a change of hart.

Yes maam.

Abowt your recomendashun.

Yes maam.

Let us not spoyl your chansis of a new start she sez. I shall write you a recomendashun myself. You may approov it. I shall do all I can to make sure you find a good pozishun.

O that wud be ever so kind maam, I sez. Cos if I fownd a good pozishun qwickly, I should be far too busy to be writin letters to peepul an that.

Of course you wud, she sez. Well it is settld then.

Thank you maam, I sez.

I left er office and went back down to our place and kate wos there.

Wot she want, kate sez, lookin at me nervus.

I sez, she sed they cant aford to ave both of us no more. She wantid me to chuse wether I go or you go.

Kate look at me terrer stricken.

I sez, its all right kate, im goin. Your safe.

I knew she was appy for erself, but she was also sad for me.

O ida she sez, and she burst into tears. Im so sorry.

Its all right kate, I sez, and I give er a hug. Its time for me to go any way. Your goin to be fine.

But its so bloody unfair, kate sez, oldin on to me.

Well yes I sez, but not reelly, cos this just shows we were right. There up against it and one of us as to go. Better its me. Ive got a better chance outside.

But I shall miss you, she sez.

Ill miss you too, I sez, but aint nothin we can do about it so best crack on. I got two weeks notiss and now Im not worried any more about losin my job. And neether do you ave to be. They junkd me so they cant junk you.

But wot are you goin to do, she sez.

I sez, Mrs F will give me a recomendashun dont you worry.

She sez, ow do you know. Shes such a bitch.

I sez, cos she knows I can fuckin destroy her if she dont.

And kate stopped sobbin and lookd at me.

Ow are you goin to do that, she sez.

I sez, I told her Id write to this lady I know what works for the bloke gave me the book, tellin er that Mrs F took it off me. That way theyd know.

Bloody ell ida, she sez.

Yeah, I sez. Well, jokes on er, cause I already done it. I done it last Monday.

Kate smiled.

Ida, she sez, your bloody mad.

Wots she goin to do, I sez, fire me.

She larfed.

I sez, you ang on, kate, I am goin to be some one, and when I am some one, I will get you out of this pissy house and this pissy family.

O ida, she sez.

The old order changeth, I sez, yieldin place to new.

Wot? she sez.

It was in the book, I sez. It means, things goin to be diffrent around ere.

And we held each other and larfed and it was so good.

*

Gilbert Scope to William Casaubon

Friday 18 August 1905

Well, you must have gathered by now that my attempt to scale the peak of Monte Esquire was unsuccesful.

I should not have been surprised. He had the benefit of a lifetime of self-denial. It was foolish of me to think that my charms, such as they are, could tempt him.

However.

I did make an unexpected ally in the Efficient Miss Fawcett.

Dear boy, you know my thoughts about the female sex, and I know that you disapprove of my sentiments, with your (to me, hitherto) inexplicable fondness for them. I have overlooked this, because of your charm, your intelligence and your integrity, but privately, I have always considered it one of your delightful weaknesses.

What can I say. Miss F. has quite confounded me. She turned out to have impressive reservoirs of sympathy, insight and what I can only call guts. I must reconsider my earlier opinions.

... I sense you wanting me to divulge more details.

For once, I must be silent. I like the woman. And what passed between us shall remain between us.

I shall simply have to write about it, one day.

Names suitably changed, of course.

*

From the diary of Edith Fawcett:

Sat 19 August 1905

Mr Scope returned from London in the afternoon, bearing presents for Mr Squire and I. Mr Squire got a rare bottle of wine (at least, I believe to be rare, from the fuss Mr Squire made over it--my knowledge of oenology is scant).

Mr Scope gave me a flat, dark grey cardboard box, which was unexpectedly heavy. There was evidence along one side that a label had been removed, as if the contents should be a surprise. I thought with some embarrassment that it might contain jewellery, but this seemed unlikely even for one so emotionally giddy as Mr Scope. He, Mr Squire and I stood around the dining room table as I opened it.

Inside lay a dark metal object, roughly in the shape of an L, with a kind of wooden grip on the short leg of the L.

Incised into the smooth longer leg were the words:

AUTOMATIC COLT

CALIBER.45 RIMLESS SMOKELESS

It was, indeed, a pistol.

'Great heavens,' Mr Squire said mildly.

I looked up. Mr Scope was grinning at us.

'State of the art, Miss Fawcett,' he said. 'Like everything about you.'

'Thank you very much, Mister Scope,' I said, quite bemused, 'but what need have I of a pistol?'

'The old order changeth, yielding place to new,' he said. 'There may be turbulent times ahead. I think a young lady ought not to be unprotected.'

'I have never used a gun in my life,' I said.

'Does it come with some sort of instructions?' Mr Squire said. 'I have heard that the first thing we must do is ensure that the thing is not loaded.'

I picked the thing up, ascertained what was the 'business end', pointed it off into a corner, and fiddled with it. I found that I could draw part of the top of the long part backwards, and peered down into a cavity.

'Seems to be unloaded,' Mr Squire said.

'There should be a button somewhere that releases the magazine,' Mr Scope said, reaching for it. 'If I...'

'I think it would be best if one of us at a time handles the gun,' I said. I fiddled with it some more, but to no avail. All of a sudden I did something that made it snap back to its original configuration.

'Well,' I said, placing the gun back in its box, 'thank you very much, Mr Scope. I am sure that if I am ever in the Wild West, it will come in tremendously useful.'

I suppose I had better find someone to instruct me in its handling.

Sun 20 August 1905

I have been thinking about Ida's letter.

It is remarkable to me that, although to the eye of an aesthetician, or a designer of women's clothing, Ida would hardly be an acme of physical beauty, yet I cannot get her out of my mind.

Before I came to Curl House, I thought of myself as someone with a normal appetite for sexual pleasure, even if I had only experienced it in the company of girls my own age--but that is perhaps because the company I was mostly in, was girls my own age. Since I became conscious of these things, I have never been insensible to the handsomeness of men; I was simply never in a position to form a liaison with one.