Home for Horny Monsters

Hi all! Back again with the next chapter of HFHM!

New to the story? You want to start at Chapter One. This story has plenty of sex and plot, so you'll still get plenty of the good stuff.

Returning reader? Welcome back, lovelies! I think one of the best things about writing this story has been seeing familiar names and faces in the comments. I'm so happy that you've stuck with me this long and am grateful to keep bringing you this tale. I also appreciate some of the helpful feedback and critiques you have given me, especially as I work on my craft. I am always trying to get better, so it's great to have so many of you point out when you feel like I'm slipping because it gives me that outside perspective that I feel any creator needs. I might not make everybody happy, but I'm still going to do my best to bring you a well-written story.

Been awhile? Basic Recap: Mike has been captured by centaurs and Yuki has used her magic to turn the residents of the house to stone.

Seven of Swords

Beth said very little to the minotaur as they climbed the trail to the top of the cliffs. She could tell he wanted to comfort her, but there weren't words or deeds to make the situation right. Her plan was to speak with Naia and Sofia right away, to see if either of them could offer her any help. There were only a few days to make her decision, and she wouldn't be able to live with any of her options.

She remembered when she was little, her parents started arguing nightly about their dog Chunky. These heated discussions often ended in tears, and Beth had been sent to her room more than once with the assurance that everyone was okay, but they were very upset. When she was older, they explained that Chunky had become very sick and the vet had recommended that he be euthanized. The argument her parents kept having was not if they should do it, but when. Every extra day meant the world to Chunky, but he was getting progressively worse. How could they choose when the pain of a single day overrode the possibility of table scraps, or running around in the backyard and smelling squirrel poop?

Chunky's fate was inevitable, but the choice itself was what had caused so much pain. No matter what she chose, she would still end up in the demon's grasp, but one decision was far and above the best option for her new family.

Unless she could find another solution. There had to be a way out, some new trick she could pull. She had beaten him once, and only by sheer, dumb bad luck had he decided to latch a piece of darkness onto her soul, intending to grant her damnation in exchange for eternal youth, beauty, or whatever he had planned.

She had time. Mike was going on a quick trip into his wardrobe, and she knew he'd be back soon. With all the heads of the house pushed together, she felt hopeful that a plan could be made without her. After all, she had no idea how to know that he was watching.

She pushed open the door to the greenhouse and nearly slipped on the snow and ice that had formed at the entrance. Walking carefully forward, she waited until Asterion had followed her out before closing the door and staring dumbstruck at the backyard.

"What the hell?" She stuck a hand out and caught a fat flake in the palm of her hand. It was snowing hard enough that the grass had vanished beneath a blanket of white, and icicles had already formed along the roof.

"Hmm." Asterion gazed upward. "It still smells of early fall."

"Are you sure? Now I'm worried that we were somehow stuck in there for months or years or something." The last thing she needed was to find out the greenhouse had malfunctioned and Oliver had sold out Mike and the others. Then again, that would take away the fun in making her choose to join him.

"I do not like the cold." He hefted his axe. "It makes my weapon slippery."

"Well, you shouldn't be needing it anytime soon." A drift of snow fell free of the roof. "Maybe." Had the Society started something new? There should still be plenty of time on the sundial. Beth wrapped her arms around her torso and looked up into the sky. The clouds had become a low lying fog, but she could see where they bunched up against the edge of the home's magical shell. Whatever was happening had been caused from within.

A loud boom came from the front of the house.

"Shit." Beth broke into a jog, careful to watch her step. The ground was more ice than snow, and she felt herself slipping every few steps. Asterion's long strides allowed him to keep up easily, his hooves clomping in the snow.

Another boom echoed over the house, the wind picking up dramatically. Another sound like a shriek made her duck down, and the minotaur caught up, hovering over her like a shield. The flurries assaulted them from every direction now and visibility dropped to a couple of feet. They moved close to the house, using the slats as a guide.

"Naia?" Beth called out for the nymph, hoping she would answer. They ended up huddling by the house as the storm escalated. Asterion leaned against the wall, leaning his axe against the house. They stayed there for several minutes, and the chill of the storm infiltrated her clothing, causing her teeth to chatter.

The loud noises ceased, and the storm died down. The low clouds above quickly turned to more flurries and fell to the earth, and they could see once more. Beth slid out from beneath the minotaur and hurried toward the back yard. She was cold and wanted to get inside as quick as possible.

Stepping around the corner of the house, she found herself staring at the fountain. It was frozen now with icicles hanging off of its outer rim. A gray figure stood at the edge, unmoving and covered in snow.

"Naia?" Beth stepped toward the back door of the home to get a better look at the figure, then clasped a hand tightly across her mouth to hold in a scream.

The statue standing by the fountain's edge had a look of surprise on her face, her hair flared back as if a breeze had been running through it. One hand was outstretched, fingers spread as if trying to stop a ball.

It was Naia. Stunned, Beth gazed at her for several seconds, uncertain of what to say or do. Asterion now held the axe tightly in both hands, his intense gaze sweeping across the backyard. Beth's heart slammed against the inside of her chest, and she touched Naia's hand.

"What could have done this?" she asked.

Asterion shook his head. "I do not know."

Another loud bang kept from the front of the house. Beth grabbed Asterion by the wrist and pulled him toward the house. Once inside, the sounds were muffled, but loud enough that she could tell they came from out front. Grateful for the warmth of the home, she was nearly at the front window for a look outside when the front door opened.

Tink and Reggie went flying across the front room and crashed near the bottom of the stairs.

"Run!" Sofia yelled, then the door slammed behind her. Tink stood up and adjusted her goggles over her eyes.

"Tink, what's happening?" Beth asked.

"Bad lady!" Tink picked up Reggie by the scruff of his neck and pushed him up the stairs. "Tink saw, turn other rats to stone." Outside the door, the sound of clashing steel echoed through the window.

Beth tried to look through the window, but Tink slammed her club into the floor, drawing her attention back.

"No look, or turn to stone." She pulled Beth away from the glass and then went back, eyes closed, to pull Jenny out of her dollhouse. "We run, find husband, he fix everything."

"How is Mike going to fix this?" She could hear voices through the door.

"Husband fix. Husband always fix." The look Tink gave her left no room for argument. Tink believed in Mike. There was room for nothing else in her heart. "Run for rat halls."

"No." Reggie stood on the stairs, his tail whipping back and forth. "We must lead her away from my people. We cannot risk them being turned to stone."

"We should return to the Labyrinth," Asterion said, wary eyes on the front door. "It is the safest place for us."

Reggie nodded, and Beth agreed. Asterion's knowledge of the Labyrinth would keep them safe. They ran up the stairs together, stopping briefly for Reggie to tell a pair of rats to lock up the tunnels. At the top of the stairs, they ran into Carmina. The fairy followed, and they were in Beth's room when they heard the front door of the house open.

"Move!" Asterion pushed them all to the closet, then grabbed the bed and shoved it up against the door. They ran together, Carmina lighting the way ahead. They were near the end of the tunnel when they heard a loud crash behind them.

Asterion's thick arm circled Beth's waist and he jumped down the steep incline of the switchback trail. Tink and Reggie followed, the air filled with the sound of rocks tumbling around them. With every landing, Beth felt the air pressed out of her lungs, her heart jumping into her throat. Her skirt billowed up on one jump, exposing her bare ass to the others.

She thought she heard Tink giggle, but it was hard to tell.

Once at the bottom, the minotaur set her down and they all moved toward the thick door of the Labyrinth. Beth cast a wary eye at the reflecting pool, hoping that Oliver didn't have a way to jump out and ambush them somehow. She noticed that Asterion kept himself between her and the pool, and she was grateful for it.

"Bad lady!" Tink suddenly cried, and Beth looked over her shoulder. Frost was forming at the top of the hill around a figure in white who emerged from the cave. Beth spun around, suddenly frightened that she might get turned to stone. The large doors of the Labyrinth were in reach, and Asterion stood on the pressure plate, causing the doors to open.

In the air around them, giant swords appeared out of nowhere, swirling around them like leaves in a storm. They slammed into the ground, attempting to pin them in place, but Asterion smashed them out of the way with his axe, the group following close behind him.

Just inside the door, several rats were surprised to see everybody come running in, but joined along when they realized that Reggie was there too. The doors slammed shut behind them, and Asterion led them down one of the long corridors, guiding them past a tripwire and into a hidden tunnel. He slowed down just enough to make sure that everyone could keep up, and soon they were traveling a narrow underground tunnel that Beth knew from experience took them to Ratu's lair.

Behind them, the Labyrinth was silent.

Asterion had them wait in a hidden cave, disappearing back the way they had come. Beth finally felt like she could breathe again, and Tink sat on the floor, her face twisted into a sour expression.

"What happened up there?" Beth asked.

"Not too sure. Fox Lady and Stone Butt get into big fight. Tink go and watch. Stone Butt frozen in big ice, then fox come at Tink. Tink brave, but One Eye throw Tink and Rat King into house. Tink see other rats turn to stone through window." She let out a deep breath. "Husband in big trouble this time."

Beth wondered what special nickname Tink had for her. "Where is Mike? Is he back yet?"

"Tink don't know, but Tink can find."

"How? Didn't he leave through a magic door or something?"

"Maybe, but no matter. Tink find husband anywhere. When first meet, Tink give special bite. Can always feel husband, no matter where. Good rats help Tink, chew hole in wall, bring husband back, then smash Fox Lady into rug." She smacked her club on the ground for emphasis. "Tink make brilliant plan."

"Really? Do you think you can find him in another world?"

Tink nodded sagely, then tapped her nose. "Goblin always have to know where husband go. Need to keep husband out of trouble."

Amazing. Beth didn't know if Tink was telling the truth, but she definitely seemed sure of herself. If she was right, then they could find Mike and bring him back, though she wasn't certain what good that would do. An enemy that could turn you to stone was a hard sell, and if not for her own problems, she was tempted to leave.

"Tink, I have another question for you." Beth knelt in front of the goblin. "This bite. Could you do it to anyone?"

She shrugged. "Maybe, but Tink don't know.. Goblin only give special bite for special reason."

"Amazing." The speck of an idea was forming, but she would need to talk to Reggie first and see if it was possible.

Asterion appeared in the opening, startling her enough that she let out a yelp. He chuckled, then motioned for them to exit the cave.

"She is no longer pursuing you," he said, guiding them away from the cave. "She has yet to come inside the Labyrinth."

"That's strange. I thought she was here to kill us or something."

"Maybe not." Reggie rubbed his chin, his whiskers shaking. His crown had gone missing during their escape, but he still had his toy glasses. "During her engagement with Abella, she seemed more interested in diplomacy."

"Really?" Now that was something she wished she had known earlier. "Did she say anything else?"

"Nothing I could hear. She summoned a snow storm and then fought the gargoyle quite brilliantly, I'm afraid." Reggie shivered, rubbing at his cheeks. "I hope my people are okay."

"We'll make sure of it, just you wait." She hoped it was a promise she could keep.

They eventually arrived in the center of the Labyrinth, and they entered the magical pagoda where Ratu lived. Inside, there was plenty of room for everybody to sit at a large table. Asterion excused himself to go set some alarms in case they were chased, and Beth sat down with Tink, Reggie and the other rats. Jenny was propped up on the table next to Carmina, but showed no evidence that she was even paying attention.

"So where do we go from here?" She felt like it was a great question to ask. "How much time is left on the sundial?"

"Maybe twelve hours," Reggie answered. "Though I don't know for sure. He spoke with me not too long before he left."

"Okay Tink, then problem one is that we need to get Mike back before the dial turns back. Do you think you can find him that fast?"

Tink shrugged. "All depend on rat. Rat hole take time, and Tink won't know until Tink look in right hole."

"I see." She turned back to Reggie. "How quick can you open a hole?"

"There are others hidden throughout the Labyrinth doing work for mistress Ratu. If we can round them up, then maybe an hour."

"Really, an hour?" That was far too long.

Reggie shrank. "If you want it big enough for a human to pass through, then yes."

"No need big hole. Tink just need hole big enough for seeing." The goblin held up her fingers in the shape of an O. "Tink take good look, know if husband there."

"How long would that take?"

Reggie mulled it over. "Maybe a few minutes. A hole that big can only be chewed open by one rat, so we could open many holes at once, but we have to be careful."

"Why?"

"If you open too many holes next to each other, the portals won't work properly and might accidentally open into each other, which can cause instability and eventually collapse the room we started in."

"Meaning?"

Reggie clapped his hands together dramatically. "Rat pancake."

"Okay, then we will exercise caution. Have your subjects rounded up and brought here."

He nodded, throwing a look at his subordinates. They gave little rat salutes and hopped down off their chairs, disappearing into the shadows of the pagoda. Beth could hear their tiny feet scratching on the stone as they left.

"So now we just need to open a bunch of random holes in reality and hope for the best." Beth rolled her eyes. Given enough time, their plan was guaranteed, but she had the distinct feeling that they were gonna need a healthy dose of luck as well. Even if they found Mike, they still had the woman upstairs to deal with.

No. She would face her problems one at a time. Focusing too much on the future would make her unable to deal with the present. Thinking of the demon latched to her soul, she knew she had to tell the others now. To put it off would put them in harm's way, and once their current issue was dealt with, there would be little time to figure out how to save her. And who knew, maybe they would have an answer for her.

"Hey Tink? Reggie? I have a problem." She told them the whole story, fighting back tears as the reality of her situation was allowed to fully sink in. When she was done, she was met with a stunned silence. Several moments passed them by before Tink hopped off her stool and threw her arms around Beth's waist.

"No worry. Husband fix this too."

Beth wiped a tear from her cheek.

"I certainly hope so," she replied.

-

When the centaurs came for him, they were pretty rough. Grabbing him by the arms, they lifted him just enough that his toes could barely touch the ground, so he hop-walked between them, casting a glance at the small lump of grass by the wall where Ratu was hiding.

Once outside, he squinted against the harsh light of the sun. It was sinking toward the horizon, but MIke figured there was at least an hour before sundown. The tribe was thick around him as he was escorted and, sure enough, a large crowd had gathered out on the floor of the valley. Torches lined the pathway they took him down, and he found himself led to a large clearing with a small hill just above it. Standing on the hill was the Grand Stallion, his staff clutched in a hand that was so tight that his knuckles had gone white. Centaur men and women surrounded the hill, and they spread apart to let him in. The group was eerily silent, and he saw anger and distrust in their eyes.

Just like he had planned. Mike forced a smug grin before he was bodily tossed into the clearing, landing on his face and biting his lip. He moved quickly, standing up and brushing the dirt off his pants.

"I find your hospitality lacking." MIke locked eyes with the Grand Stallion, finally getting a good look at him. His hindquarters were a dark black, and his skin had the deep tan of dozens of summers. Deep lines criss-crossed his forehead and his impressive salt and pepper beard came halfway down his chest before terminating in a braid.

"You are not here for our hospitality," the Grand Stallion told him. "You are here because you have been challenged—"

"My name is MIke, by the way. That's a custom amongst my people, a polite introduction."

The air filled with the sound of anxious murmurs and the Grand Stallion gave him a dirty look.

"You are here because—"

"Zel always told me about how amazing her people were. Polite, refined. Dignified even. So I'll try again. My name is Mike and—" Someone jabbed him in the back with a spear butt and he hopped forward in response. "I'm the Caretaker."

The Grand Stallion glared at him, visibly grinding his teeth. "Are you finished?"

"I'm just trying to observe my own customs as a show of respect, Your Honor."

"You will refer to him as Grand Stallion." This was from a female centaur by his side in battle armor with a silver blade across each hip and chainmail armor. "And you will dial back your impertinence."

"Oh, I apologize. We haven't been formally introduced, per my custom, else I would have known the honorific he preferred. I mean, that is the point of my tradition."

"Your petty human traditions hold little sway over us, Mike the Caretaker. Your kind have brought naught but harm and chaos to the Herd, and therefore we feel no need to honor them."

"Yet you force me to abide by yours? You do realize this entire world is inside of a wardrobe which is inside my house? Human law dictates that, by proxy, summa cum laude, abracadabra, I own this place."

Shouting came from the centaurs around him and an ice cold chill filled his gut and sank down to his legs. He dropped to one knee in response just as a rock flew overhead, crashing against the ground in front of him.